


Send in the Clowns

by Daretodream66



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Alpha Bucky Barnes, Alpha Natasha Romanov, Alpha Tony Stark, Alpha/Omega Steve Rogers, Alternate Universe - A/B/O, Angst with a Happy Ending, BAMF Clint Barton, BAMF Nick Fury, BAMF Tony Stark, Beta Bruce Banner, Beta George Barnes, But that's all I have for now, Captain America Steve Rogers/Modern Bucky Barnes, Clint Barton & Natasha Romanov Friendship, Clint Barton Is a Good Bro, Depressed Steve Rogers, Falling In Love, Fluff, Hulk is a softy, Idiots in Love, M/M, Marriage, Mating Bites, Mating Bonds, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Mental Health Issues, Mpreg, Omega Clint Barton, Protective Bucky Barnes, Protective Clint Barton, Protective Tony Stark, So Little Time, So many tags, Soft Bucky Barnes, Steve Rogers Feels, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Transgender without being Transgender, Unspecified Thor, You have to read to get that explanation, soft steve rogers, there's probably more - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-06
Updated: 2020-10-06
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:01:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 25,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26866327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daretodream66/pseuds/Daretodream66
Summary: Steve wakes up in the 21st Century and everything is still wrong.  He finds friends in the strangest places and finds out that he doesn't have to hide who he is.  There's marriage, mating, babies and Bucky loves him through all of that.I still can't get the notes to open up, so I'll put this here.  JARVIS explains what transgender means and even though Steve doesn't fit the normal definition, something about it rings true.  If you don't like that kind of thing, don't click to read.  I loved writing this story and felt entitled since I am transgender.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers
Comments: 19
Kudos: 155





	1. Chapter 1

The street signs whiz past the windows of the car. This isn’t his city anymore, but he has to put on the smile and pretend to be something he’s not sure he is anymore. If he’s honest with himself, he doesn’t understand it, back then, he would have done anything to be seen. But now, now he doesn’t see himself anymore, he only sees the persona. It doesn’t help that since his body settled into the serum nothing works the way it used to. He’d let himself forget that, until it reared its ugly head again after coming out of the ice. Since Dr. Erskine died that fateful day, no one could tell him why it happened, but it had and he was stuck this way in a body that he never dreamed of and a designation he didn’t understand.

Tony reaches over, patting Steve’s leg, causing Steve to jump. That was the other issue, everything is too much. Like there’s too much input all the time. Tony doesn’t react to his start. “Time to smile for the cameras, Cap.” Yeah, that’s another thing, he’s just Cap now. Steve’s gone.

They exit the car with cameras flashing and Steve has to shield his eyes from the onslaught of just too much. “Do they have to be like this?”

Tony smirks behind his glasses. “This is what they do.” For the billionaire that spent most of his life in front of a camera, this is nothing new. For Steve, just weeks after the invasion, not only is this new, it’s unwanted. He’s a dancing monkey all over again.

They sit in the green room and Steve stares at a wall. He doesn’t know how that little guy from Brooklyn, who may have been small and sickly, who was born an alpha has become this. When he first woke up, he thought that maybe it had changed, but after the Battle of New York, his body recalibrated and he had a heat, not bad, barely even there, but just enough that he knew what was happening. He doesn’t even recognize himself anymore. Maybe Steve Rogers really did die in that plane and what’s left is just Captain America. 

The greatest alpha to ever live.

The interview is over and Steve wants to walk back to the Tower, but he knows that he doesn’t have that luxury. According to Tony, Captain America is the hottest thing out there, so he gets in the car and stares at the passing buildings. When they get back, Steve goes to his floor and asks for Blackout.

He doesn’t come out for days. It’s finally JARVIS, after watching Captain Rogers for two days, sit by the window and stare out at a city he doesn’t feel part of, who questions the man out of time. ‘Captain Rogers, sir, could I be of assistance?’

Steve doesn’t mean to jump, but these days he’s either in battle or locked away in his head. “I don’t think so JARVIS, but thank you.” He can’t take the chance of saying anything to the AI because Peggy did one hell of a job hiding his new designation from everyone. All of his files tell the story of a scrawny alpha, so to the world, SHIELD, his teammates, he’s an alpha. Hell, in Steve’s own mind he’s still an alpha no matter what his body does.

‘Sir, shall I call someone for you?’

If Steve didn’t know that JARVIS was just an artificial intelligence, he’d swear that voice sounded caring. “There isn’t anyone to call. The whole world thinks they know me, but the people that really remember who I am are all gone.”

‘Sir, perhaps it would help to know that once you called for Blackout on your floor, even Mr. Stark is not privy to our conversation.’

Steve sits up. “You mean if I tell you something, you can’t repeat it if I’m under Blackout Protocol?” For the first time, Steve has hope that he can say everything that weighs on him without anyone ever finding out.

‘I am indeed saying that, Captain.’

“JARVIS, are there any listening devices in this apartment?” He’s suspected, but didn’t bother looking because no one would ever hear things that Steve would never say out loud. And if he’s going to do this, he’s going to make sure that JARVIS is the only one that knows.

‘I regret to inform you that Agent Romanov at Director Fury’s behest has placed listening devices in eight different locations. Shall is disable them?’

“Yes JARVIS, please disable all of them.” There’s a faint sizzling sound. Steve gets up and moves around, counting the small patches of smoke coming from places that he never would have looked. “JARVIS, how did you know that they were here?”

‘Captain, part of my programming is to take care of those under my charge. When Agent Romanov placed the devices, I advised her against it, but she insisted. I might also mention the cameras in the ventilation. One over the entryway.’

Steve shakes his head and goes to remove the camera by the front door, crushing it under his heel. “Is that everything?”

‘Yes sir, your apartment is now in a complete lockdown.’ There’s a pause and Steve looks up at the ceiling. ‘What can I help you with?’

He unburdens himself to the AI and JARVIS listens, asking questions about the serum, questions that Steve doesn’t have the answers to. “So, everyone thinks they know who I am, but JARVIS, this isn’t who I am, but I’m not sure I know myself anymore.”

‘Sir, I have many curiosities about the serum and why it would change something so fundamental about you, but I can see why you feel…out of place. It is not just that you woke up in a new century, but that you woke up to find the most basic part of who you are, still changed.’

“Being an alpha was part of me. This isn’t.” Steve just keeps staring out of the window at a slowly darkening sky. “I don’t know how to be an omega because I’m not and never was. Everything about it is wrong.” There’s a long pause before the AI answers.

‘Captain Rogers, sir, have you come across the term transgender in your studies?’

Steve looks up at the ceiling. “No, I don’t think that’s been part of my mandatory reading.”

‘Normally, the term refers to a person being born into the wrong body.’

Steve shakes his head. “I don’t understand.”

‘Sometimes, Captain, a person is born into a female body, but they never feel that it is who they really are and vice versa. These people are called transgender and we now have the technology to alter the body to fit the mind.’

He finally sees what JARVIS is trying to tell him. “You mean doctors can change the body like that and you think that I might fit into this category because I’m in a body that isn’t right?”

‘Quite right, sir. Many thousands of people have become who they know they are. Unfortunately, there is not a surgery to change an omega to an alpha or the other way around. I am sorry, sir.’

Steve stands and feels lighter somehow. “Don’t apologize. I have a name for it now. Can you put everything relevant on my reading list?”

‘Of course.’

Steve heads to the bedroom to read. “And thanks, JARVIS.”

‘It’s my pleasure, Captain.’

Steve spends months reading and finding everything about being transgendered fascinating. Everything about it fits how he feels about himself. He knows it’s not what’s actually meant by the term, but for all intents and purposes, it fits his state of being. In between he goes on missions and is confronted by Natasha about the bugs in his apartment. With more confidence than he’s felt since the serum was given to him, he looks her in the eye and tells her to, “back the fuck off.” The whole Quinjet freezes at his words, but the only sound is Tony whistling.

After that interaction, Steve takes it upon himself to go out into the city and find a place for himself. He returns to Brooklyn and finds the Brooklyn Community Pride Center. There’s a bit of an uproar when he walks in and asks to speak to someone in the counseling department. He gets a strange look, but before long he’s being taken to the man in charge of counseling. He introduces himself as Dr. George Barnes and asks Steve to sit. Closing the door, he goes to his desk and watches Steve look around in curiosity. 

“What can I help you with, Steve?” Steve goes from tense to relaxed at the fact that this man didn’t call him Captain.

“Is it true that anything we talk about is kept private?” Steve feels nervous, but something about George is calming. He’s a beta and that helps.

“That is true.” He leans over his desk. “Steve, there’s no recording devices here, no one that wants you to be hurt. We’re a family here and families take care of each other.”

Rubbing his hands across his pants, Steve tries to get his nerves under control. “I need to talk to someone and Brooklyn used to be home.”

George gets up and comes around the desk, sitting next to Steve, he reaches out. His hand sits comfortingly on Steve’s arm and Steve blows out a breath. “Say what you need to say. I would never judge you.”

Steve nods and starts telling George everything from before the serum to his conversation with JARVIS. “I know that I don’t really fit the transgender norm, but everything that I’ve read, it’s the closest thing to how I feel.”

He doesn’t realize that he’s crying and hates that he can’t always control his emotions. George gets up, kneeling in front of Steve and offering a hug. Steve falls into his arms, sobbing. Hands rub up and down his back. “It’s okay. It doesn’t feel like it, but we’ll get there together. Let it out. Everything you’ve had to carry, just let it out.”

Steve leaves George’s office and is introduced to several of the other people that keep the Center running. It’s nearing lunch and Steve is having a conversation with a few of the young people that have come in for appointments when the door opens and a man walks in carrying more bags than his arms can really carry. Jumping up, Steve goes to help before the man drops everything he’s trying to get through the door. “Thanks man, I guess I’m not as coordinated as I thought.” The man looks up smiling and when he sees who’s holding the door and grabbing for the slipping bags, he doesn’t even blink. “Appreciate it.” 

Since being given the serum, Steve makes a point not to notice people because it’s safer that way. If no one gets close, then no one finds out his secret, but this man is very pretty. His hair catches the sunlight coming through the glass door and Steve wants to call it chestnut with auburn highlights. His eyes sparkle and not just because they dance between pale blue and grey, but because he just seems to be filled with mischief. His day old scruff doesn’t look rough, but instead looks like it would be soft to the touch. Steve clears his throat to chase away those thoughts.

Swallowing thickly, Steve blushes. “Any time. I’m glad I could help.” George comes from the office area, grinning. 

“Bucky! What did you bring today?” The younger man smiles, sitting the bags on the counter and hugging George. “Ah, Steve, I see you’ve met my son. Bucky, this is Steve.”

The man, Bucky, offers his hand. Steve takes it, smiling in return. “It’s good to meet you and thanks again for the help.” He turns back to George. “I brought lunch for you and probably most of the people here. Mrs. Martinelli insisted.” Bucky turns back to Steve. “If you haven’t been to Martinelli’s, you have got to go. That woman can cook like nothing you’ve ever had before.”

Steve chuckles. “I don’t suppose that would be the Martinelli’s on R would it?”

“It would indeed. I see that you know your food. Good man.” Steve can’t help the laughter that bubbles out of him. Bucky treats him like anyone else and it’s refreshing. “You should stay for lunch. She loaded me up with everything.” He leans in like it’s a secret. “Including zeppole with cannoli cream for dipping.” He does a chef’s kiss causing Steve to laugh again. 

“I’m not sure I’m supposed to take people’s food, but I’m also not sure I can resist.” Bucky slaps him on the back and they follow George to the back where they set up the food. Steve ends up spending the entire day at the Center, laughing and enjoying the company of everyone. He also watches the way that Bucky laughs and talks with everyone. The man doesn’t seem to know a stranger. He’s so comfortable here and with himself. Steve can’t help but smile and when Bucky catches his eye, Steve finds himself blushing under the friendly grin.

The following week, he goes in for his appointment with George, but ends up staying the whole day again, talking with kids and adults. The most heartfelt conversation he has is with a man in his 50’s that’s just started to transition. They talk about the feelings associated and the dysphoria that comes with being in the wrong body. Steve doesn’t reveal anything about himself, but he listens and can relate to everything the man is saying.

Bucky comes in again with food for his father and just happens to bring enough for Steve as well. They sit in the kitchen of the Center eating and talking when George goes back to his office for another appointment. The conversation lags some, but Steve doesn’t feel pressured into talking, until Bucky quietly says, “Thanks for coming here and just being present. It helps to have someone like you visible for everyone here.” He doesn’t seem to know that Steve’s in counseling too, so George didn’t reveal it to anyone.

Steve doesn’t looks up from his food. “I’m here as much for me as I am for them.”

Bucky doesn’t ask what he means or push for more talking, he just smiles. Steve leaves the Center that day feeling just as light as he did the week before. It becomes a routine that’s only interrupted when a mission comes up. When that happens, he sends a text to George to let him know and always gets the same response, ‘We’ll be here when you get back.’

The latest mission goes on much longer than Steve wishes for it to, but it’s part of the job. He’s been out of the ice for nearly eight months now and in that time he’s gone to the Center almost every week. In that time, he’s become friends with some of the people and carries their numbers in his phone. One of those is Bucky. 

Halfway through the mission, his phone lights up. Steve just happens to see it because he’s in the get trying to rest. The Avengers, when fights go on for long periods of time, rest in shifts. ‘Steve, I don’t know when you’re going to be back, but we’re headed out of town for a little while. My grandmother is sick. I just wanted you to know in case you came in for my dad and he’s not there. Take care out there.’

Three days after the text, when the fight is over, Steve takes the time to send a response to Bucky. ‘I hope everything is okay with your grandmother. Tell your dad to take care of family first.’

The response is quick and to the point. ‘I thought you figured it out by now, Steve, you are family.’

It reminds Steve of _that_ afternoon and he doesn’t know what to do about it. It’s not like he could talk to George about something like this. Could he? Huffing a laugh, he knows that he can’t. His laugh draws the attention of his teammates on the way home. Natasha Romanov makes Steve nervous. It isn’t that she’s a strong woman, he likes strong women, it’s the fact that he knows she’s never completely honest about who she is. She’s spent so many years being a spy that she doesn’t know how to be open. “What’s got you so amused? And who do you keep texting?”

Everyone on the team tries not to look interested, but Steve can tell they are. “There are these things, Romanov, called friends.”

“Really, you went out and made friends?” She’s trying to see his screen, so he slips the phone back into his pocket.

“As surprising as it is, yes, I’ve made some friends.” Tony turns in the pilot seat, smirking. The man is always smirking.

“Now that she knows, Cap, she’s going to be following you and tracing your texts to make sure it isn’t some big bad that you’re too innocent to recognize.” Steve gets up to get water, but really he’s got another objective. While he’s up, he sends a text to JARVIS and asks him to Blackout all of his texts and phone calls. He gets an affirmative.

Back at the Tower, he goes straight to his quarters and calls for Blackout. “JARVIS, have anymore bugs been planted?”

‘Just one, sir and I have already disabled it.’

“Thank you.” Steve knows he needs to shower, but he’s wound up. “JARVIS, can we talk for a few minutes?”

‘Of course, sir.’

Steve starts telling JARVIS about George and then Bucky. He talks about having lunch with them and then he tells him about _that_ day.

_Lunch turned out to be Mrs. Martinelli’s again and when they cleaned up after, Bucky turned to Steve with a grin. “You need to come with me. I want some ice cream and if I go alone, it’s just pathetic. So come on, Stevie, let’s get some ice cream.”_

_Steve chuckles, but has a wicked sweet tooth, so getting ice cream sounds like a good plan. “Alright Buck, let’s go.”_

_They meander through the streets until they reach the place that Bucky hasn’t been able to stop raving about. As they step inside, Steve notices people noticing him. He feels uncomfortable until Bucky puts a hand on his back. “Don’t think about them, just think about what kind of ice cream you want.”_

_He has teammates that pat him on the back, but no one that’s ever done it to really ground him and something about Bucky’s hand feels…natural. He has a momentary freak out because Bucky is an alpha. Something in the new instincts, ones that he’s not used to, makes him lean into the touch, so Bucky keeps his hand there. Steve blushes and turns to the man just trying to be a friend. “Thanks.”_

_“From one alpha to another, you have to keep in mind that you’re like the ultimate alpha and those young ladies can’t help but be attracted to that.” There’s a split second when Steve feels really good about Bucky’s words, but when Bucky looks over at the table of women and winks at them, Steve feels something else entirely._

_They get their ice cream and walk for a little while. Steve stays quiet trying to figure out why he reacted that way. Chalking it up to nerves at being out and about, he shrugs it off. He and Bucky have been tentative friends for a couple of months and he wants to build this friendship. Bucky’s kind, funny, and sarcastic as hell sometimes and it matches Steve’s quiet disposition perfectly. “Bucky, can I ask you something? And before you snark off, yes, I know I just asked you something.”_

_Bucky barks an obnoxious laugh, slapping Steve on the back. “Yeah, you bet, punk.”_

_“Says the jerk.” Bucky snorts and nods for Steve to continue. “Are we friends?”_

_Bucky stops for a minute and just freezes. “Well I certainly hope so.” He catches up with Steve, looking at the man strangely. “Were you really concerned about that?”_

_“Well yeah, because most people want something from me and you don’t seem to want anything.” Steve catches a drip from his cone._

_Bucky bumps his shoulder with Steve’s. “I think enough people try to take from you. I’m just here to listen and drag you out for ice cream.”_

_“Thanks.” It’s quiet and Steve isn’t sure that Bucky heard him, but then his scent takes on a contented note and Steve almost leans in to get a better whiff. Once he realizes what he was about to do, Steve stiffens. His response was an omega response and it turns his stomach._

Steve finishes telling JARVIS about that day and waits. There’s nothing for a minute or so. ‘Sir, is it safe to assume that you like this person?’

“Well yeah, I like him, we’re friends.” Steve knows what JARVIS is asking, but he’s having a hard time with it himself, so saying it out loud is difficult. “Yeah JARVIS, I think I like him.”

‘And he believes you to be an alpha?’

“Yeah.” Steve sits heavily on the sofa. “In his mind, I’m just a friend and I’m afraid what’s happening is my body is reacting to him.”

‘Sir, it seems to me that it isn’t just your biology.’

“What do you mean?” Steve stares up at the ceiling even though he knows that’s not really where JARVIS is.

‘He has become your friend. You have formed a connection with him. It has been my experience that people form emotional attachments to those that they first get to know. Those that they feel are…’

There’s a pause and Steve finishes. “family.” Steve whispers the word into the quiet room.

‘Yes sir and it would seem that you and Mr. Barnes have formed that bond.’ There’s another pause. ‘Would it be so bad, Captain?’

“I would have to tell him the truth and it might change how he sees me, JARVIS.”

‘And it might not.’

The Barnes family returns to the city a week later and Steve goes in for his regular appointment with determination. As he comes through the door, Bucky is already there, talking candidly with one of the other counselors. Looking up, he beams at Steve and Steve can’t help the responding smile. Without having a mirror anywhere around, Steve knows that his smile is soft and shy. Shaking himself out of that mindset, he heads to the counter where George has come to greet him. Taking the older man’s hand, Steve feels happy. “George, it’s good to see you. I hope everything with your mother is okay.”

Bucky smacks Steve’s shoulder. “Oh, I see how it is. I’m just invisible now.”

The snark is real and tangible, but Steve’s response is like lead once he realizes what he says. “There isn’t a room that you could walk into where you’d be invisible, Bucky.”

Bucky throws his head back and laughs delightedly. Steve wants to crawl under a desk and hide, but Bucky’s delight becomes his own. “You are such a punk!”

George takes Steve’s elbow, leading him away. “Let’s get out of here before my son’s ego crowds us out.”

“Pop! Seriously?” George winks at his son and guides Steve into his office.

Sitting in the chair opposite George, Steve looks up blushing. “Do you want to talk about it?” Steve knows very well that George sees what’s happening and probably wants to put a stop to it considering all of Steve’s issues.

“George, I would never…ever…” Steve can feel himself tearing up and curses the weakness.

Raising his hands to stop Steve’s words, George comes around the desk and sits next to him. “Steve, son, you have nothing to apologize for or explain to me. I simply think you should talk about this.”

Nodding, Steve gives a hefty sniffle and looks at his therapist. “I few weeks before the mission Bucky and I went out for ice cream and I had a reaction to him. An o-omega r-reaction. I’ve been fighting myself since then to try to explain it away as…a family bond kinda feeling.” He huffs an unamused laugh. “JARVIS keeps trying to tell me that it wouldn’t be so bad, but it would be incredibly worse than even I can imagine.”

“Tell me why you think that.” George seems so concerned and Steve shakes his head.

“Should I be talking to you about your own son? Isn’t there something that…” George barks out a laugh and it’s very familiar to Steve. Bucky sounds just like him.

“In here you have to remember, I’m a therapist, not Bucky’s father. Nothing you say will offend me or leave this safe space.” Steve nods at that and knew it before the man even said it.

“My instincts are reacting to him and I don’t know what to do with that. He’s a really good man, but the minute he finds out what I am, he’ll back off. I want to be his friend and just his friend.”

George smiles, almost knowing. “Are you sure that’s all you want?”

And that’s the million dollar question for Steve. Is that all he wants? “I don’t know.” The appointment continues and when Steve gets ready to leave, George pulls him in with a warm fatherly hug. Bucky’s waiting and immediately invites Steve for a walk. With his hands in his pockets, Steve ambles along with Bucky and they talk about the mission. “They’re really hard to get to know, but they’re good in a fight.”

Bucky raises his head to the sky, enjoying the sun and Steve finds that he nearly whimpers at the exposed throat. “Don’t you think it should be more than that though? You’re with them all the time. Shouldn’t you be building friendships with them?”

Off-handedly Steve response. “Oh, I don’t really spend any time with them. Most of the time I’m in my quarters with JARVIS for company.”

Bucky stops, grabbing Steve’s bicep, pulling him to a stop too. “Okay, there is so much to unpack with that statement. First, who is Jarvis?”

Something about the brunet’s question seems…off. “Oh, he’s the AI that runs the Tower.”

Bucky nods and starts walking again, so Steve does too. “For a minute there, Stevie, I thought you had a secret boyfriend.” Again, the statement is…off, with a slight edge, but Steve can’t figure out why. “So, why aren’t you making friends with your team?”

Steve chuckles. “Well, because they all think they know who I am, but they don’t ask, they just assume.” He gives a little shrug, blushing. There’s so much that he would never say to the team. So much that he’s come so close to saying to Bucky. Knowing that the other man is just trying to be friendly, Steve sighs and keeps walking. He stops in front of a gallery and the painting in the window pulls at him. It’s a street scene, old cars, and people with umbrellas to protect from the effect of rain. 

“What do you see when you look at that, Steve?” Bucky’s next to him, bumping his shoulder into Steve’s.

“Home.” It suddenly occurs to Steve that maybe the reason he’s so prone to tears these days isn’t just because of his new designation, but because he’s been trying so hard to find what he lost. Home.

“You miss it, huh?” Steve just nods because the lump in his throat won’t let him answer. “You can have a home here. I can help you find it.” Bucky’s words are so soft with so much warmth that Steve’s next words are natural.

“You already have.” Turning he wonders what look is in his eyes for Bucky to be looking at him the way he is.

Bucky grabs his arm and pulls him down an alley. Steve stumbles, but follows the alpha until they are completely out of sight of the street. Steve leans against the wall of whatever business they’re behind, watching Bucky pace running his hands through his hair. He’s mumbling and Steve can only pick out a few words here and there, but nothing that makes any sense. “Buck?”

The man turns on him, looking frustrated and wound up in a way that’s not normally his personality. Coming at him, Bucky’s shaking his finger at Steve. “I’ve never bought into stereotypes or designations, but I’ve never been attracted to an alpha before. Too much domination and attitude, but you…you’re…why can’t you just be like those asshole alpha’s that beat their chests, why do you have to be so soft around the edges? Damnit Steve, I’m trying to be your friend, but all I can think about is taking you home and wrapping you in blankets, cuddling the hell out of you. Jesus! What is wrong with me?” He’s pacing away and Steve feels his cheeks heat up and tears well in his eyes.

His next words have Bucky freezing in his tracks. “I’m not really an alpha anymore.” The man turns on Steve and for the first time in his life, Steve Rogers runs. He hears Bucky call after him, but he doesn’t stop until he’s back at the Tower. Getting into the lift, he doesn’t even have to press the button and JARVIS is whisking him up to his floor.

‘Captain…sir…Steven, you must breathe. Your heart rate is elevated, even for you.’

Steve braces his hands on the rails, staring at the wall, and sobs into the corner of the lift and when it stops, he exits into his quarters only to find Natasha sitting on his sofa. She jumps up, but her moves are still calculated. “Well Cap, what’s this all about?”

Everything comes crashing around him. He looks up, furious, and bellows. “GET OUT!” JARVIS opens the lift doors and she’s gone. Sinking to the floor, he sobs more. “JARVIS, Blackout.”

‘Of course, sir.’

Later, he drags himself to the bathroom and sinks into a hot tub of water. His life is a mess and he’s more of one than he’s ever been. Hiding what the serum made him was easy before, but now, now there’s Bucky. He’s never wanted anyone to touch him before and the slightest brush from Bucky and something unfamiliar in Steve sings. Sitting up in the water, he wraps his arms around his knees and lays his head on top. “JARVIS, what does love feel like?”

‘I have no parameters for that question, Steven. I can tell you what it looks like from my perspective.’

“Tell me, JARVIS.” Steve’s breath hitches as he waits.

‘Love looks like never having seen a rainbow and then finding one by accident. Love looks like wanting to give the best to another person and never needing a thank you. Love looks like trying to be the best, not because someone asked, but still wanting them to notice. Love looks like giving everything to another person and feeling content with a smile.’

Steve huffs at that. “I didn’t know you were a poet, JARVIS.”

‘I simple watch interactions, sir.’

He baths slowly and pulls himself out of the water. After drying, he goes into his bedroom and pulls out the softest thing he owns, slipping into flannel pajama pants and a worn shirt, he makes his way to the kitchen for something warm. As the milk warms on the stove, Steve breaks pieces of chocolate in to slowly melt. Pouring the cocoa into a mug, he takes it into the living room, sitting it on the side table. Before he can sit, JARVIS interrupts.

‘Sir, Dr. Barnes is downstairs, asking for access to your floor. Security has called Mr. Stark because Dr. Barnes is making quite a scene.’

“Shit! Let him up, JARVIS.” Bucky must have gone straight back to the Center and gotten his father. The lift doors open and it’s not just George, who makes a beeline to Steve, taking the larger man into his arms, but Bucky is there too and so is Tony. Steve wonders what he must look like for George to know he needs the contact.

“Cap, you wanna tell me what this is all about? I got strange people coming into my Tower demanding to see you, claiming…”

Steve cuts the man off because Tony will just keep talking if he doesn’t. “He’s my therapist, Tony. Just leave it at that.”

George cups Steve’s face when they pull away. “Are you okay?”

Steve shakes his head and feels the tears coming again. “No.”

“Steve?” The super soldier looks over at Bucky. “I want to…” He doesn’t finish and comes to Steve.

The blond can’t contain anything right now and throws his arms around Bucky, holding on for his very life. Tony watches all of this and, for once, seems to realize that something monumental is happening. Something that Captain America isn’t dealing with, but a guy named Steve Rogers, that Tony doesn’t know, is. “Cap…Steve, what can I do?”

Steve takes his nose out of Bucky’s neck, but the brunet doesn’t move away, he keeps one arm wrapped around Steve as they both turn to look at Tony. Steve sees that Tony isn’t holding himself in that self-assured way, but open and willing to help. “JARVIS, Blackout Protocol and lock down the elevator.”

They all go to sit down and Bucky wanders down the hall and into Steve’s bedroom, coming back, he wraps a quilt around the super soldier’s shoulders. “I don’t really know what’s going on other than what you said in the alley, but I don’t know what that means. I went to get dad and he…well we’re here.”

Tony watches the way the man talks to Steve and how the older of the three men watches the two of them. “Steven, if you’re comfortable with it, you could try explaining everything.” George looks over at Tony. “Are you sure you want _everyone_ here though?”

Tony looks offended and as Bucky makes to go sit in a chair across from Steve, Steve grabs his hand, squeezing and then letting it go. Bucky sits and Steve looks over at Tony. He trusts that George and Bucky won’t say anything, but he has to make Tony understand. “Tony, what I’m about to share can’t leave this room. It’s my story to tell and sharing it will mean that I have to deal with some things that I’m not ready to deal with.” Tony just nods. “I was born an alpha and even though I was small, I was still an alpha. I had all the instincts and drives that any alpha would, but because I was small, not many people really gave me much thought.” They all nod because that’s all stuff they could read in the history books. “Dr. Erskine approached me about the serum and I jumped at the chance to help in a way that I couldn’t in my smaller body.” Steve chokes for just a minute and George reaches over, taking his hand. Steve takes comfort in the warmth and kindness.

“Steven, it’s okay. Take your time and remember that everyone here cares about you and will hold your secret in confidence.” Looking over at Tony, George sees the genius lower his eyes.

“Okay, so they gave me the serum and for a week or so they ran tests to see all that it had improved and changed. All of my illnesses were gone and I was stronger and faster than, well, anyone, but there was one change that got buried because no one could account for why it happened.” He looks up at Bucky, locking eyes with this man that he’s fallen in love with. “It changed my biology to an omega.”

Tony’s hand slaps over his mouth. “It what?” Steve breaks eye contact with Bucky long enough to look over at Tony. “This was never in any of my dad’s notes.”

“No, because Peggy Carter threatened to cut his dick off and feed it to him.” Steve chuckles and looks back at Bucky. “I don’t know how to be an omega. In my head and in my heart, I’m not. I’m still an alpha. It makes…” He takes a deep breath, looking down at the floor, and feels George squeeze his hand again. “It makes falling in love with you harder because I don’t know how to make sense of it.” Raising his eyes, he sees tears tracking down Bucky’s face.

“Steve?” Tony just sits back and watches how the two men look at each other and Bucky’s question hanging out there.

“I’m sorry, Buck. I didn’t mean to.” Bucky is on his knees in front of Steve, pulling the man into his arms. “I’m so sorry.”

“Ssssshhhh sweetheart, you have nothing to apologize for. I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.” Bucky can see his father giving him a proud smile. “I’m not letting you figure this out alone. I love you too, Stevie and I didn’t know what to do with that because two alpha’s don’t make for a very stable relationship. With you I’m willing to give it a go though. Jesus, I thought you’d hate me for bein attracted to ya.”

“There’s nothing wrong with either one of you. This is a complicated situation that both of you are going to have to figure out.” George looks again over at Tony. “You’ve been trusted with a very serious secret, Mr. Stark. I hope you understand the amount of trust that Steven has put in you.”

Tony leans forward, arms resting on his legs and staring at the floor. “If I’d known, I could have helped.”

“Steven wasn’t ready to say these things yet. Until he was, it was no one’s business, but his. Now that you do know, there are things that need to be protected.” Tony nods and Steve looks up. “Steven, what do you want to do about this situation with my son?”

Steve looks up at Bucky. “What do you want to do?”

There’s a mirthless chuckles from the alpha. “I don’t think that’s my decision, Steve. I can’t do anything to you that would hurt you.” He takes the super soldier’s hands in his own. “But I do want you to know that…I love you…and…and I’ll do anything you want if you’ll just let me be beside you.”

George stands, motioning for Tony to do the same. “You two need to talk, but Steven I expect to see you at your next appointment.” Steve nods and watches the two men leave.

“JARVIS, keep this floor on Blackout please, until further notice.” Bucky sits down on the sofa next to him.

‘Of course, sir.’

Bucky reaches up, brushing Steve’s hair from his forehead then sitting back on the sofa. Steve pulls his legs up and leans over into Bucky, who wraps an arm around him. “This okay?”

“Yeah.” Steve snuggles closer and pulls the quilt around to lay over their laps. “This is good.”

Steve doesn’t really remember moving to the bedroom, but he wakes in the morning warm. Everything has been so cold since waking up, but he’s warm and something smells comforting. It doesn’t take long to figure out that the warmth and the comfort are coming from Bucky. The man is still fully dressed, but sleeping soundly. Steve is cuddled into his side, with his head resting on the man’s chest. He enjoys the warmth for a little longer, then gets up to take care of his morning business. After brushing his teeth, he heads into the kitchen to start the coffee and see if he has anything for breakfast.

“I hope you don’t mind, but I found an extra tooth brush under the sink.” Steve spins around at the voice and smiles at Bucky.

“I’m glad you did. I don’t have anything to hide from you, not anymore.” Bucky pushes off the door frame and comes to lean against the counter by the coffee maker.

He’s looking down at the floor and Steve waits for whatever it is that he’s going to say. “I’d really like to kiss you.” Steve snorts a laugh and Bucky smiles. “I don’t know how you’d feel about that though.”

“I…I think I’d like that.” Coming to Steve, Bucky reaches up, caressing up his cheek.

“Don’t be afraid of me or what this is. I love you and wouldn’t hurt you.” Steve nods and Bucky leans in giving a light, tentative kiss. Giving Steve a sweet smile, Bucky turns to the coffee maker and the two mugs waiting on the counter. “How do you take your coffee?”

The moment is unlike anything that Steve’s ever experienced. It just all fits. Bucky being here. Morning rituals. Morning kisses. And quiet ‘I love yous.’ He’s still not sure how to deal with his life, his biology, but he knows that he wants Bucky to be part of it.

“Just a little milk.”


	2. Chapter 2

Some crazy shit has been going on at the Tower and Clint has no idea what the hell it is. There’s some new connection between Stark and Cap that makes no sense because the two men are like night and day, but on any given day, Cap’s down in Tony’s lab. If anyone walks in, no one could tell you what they’re talking about because they don’t talk with anyone else around. But there’s always this look and if Clint didn’t know any better, he’d say that Stark would burn the world for Cap. It’s some seriously weird shit.

Making his way downstairs, Clint’s on a mission. For some ungodly reason, there’s no coffee on any of the communal floors and boy did he let JARVIS hear about that. The AI’s reaction was as even as ever, but he was still apologetic that it hadn’t been sent up from shipping. Stepping into the cue, a few people try to move aside to let Clint go first, being an Avenger has it perks, but he shakes his head. He’s not going to get between anyone and their coffee being that he understands the addiction. 

On the other side of the coffee bar, Cap’s standing with the guy that keeps showing up at the Tower. Clint’s got no idea who he is, but if Cap’s making friends, good on him. He’s just about to call out when something happens that makes Clint question everything he thinks he knows about the world. Cap’s back is to the coffee bar and the other guy is facing it, stirring something into his cup when Cap leans over. To anyone else, it might appear that Cap’s just reaching for something on the other side of the guy, but Clint sees it because Clint sees more than most people can. There’s a reason that he never misses.

Cap scented the guy’s neck. 

Cap fucking scented the guy’s neck!

And the guy blushed, but leaned into the action!

“Jesus fucking Christ on a cracker!” The lady in front of him gives him a withering frown, but Clint’s brain, which desperately needed coffee five seconds ago, is now fully awake and running what he just saw in fast motion through his brain. Turning away from the café, Clint heads out into the streets. He’ll have to get coffee somewhere else because now his brain is in overload. 

Pulling out his phone, he hits a few buttons and then call. “Hello?” He has a moment of sappy, lovesickness at that voice.

“Babe, I need to talk to someone and I don’t trust anyone here with this. You got a minute?” Laura assures him that she’s got time and listens as her husband tells her what he just saw.

Two days later and Clint knows who the guy is now. Asking JARVIS should have been the first thing that he did, but his brain…fried…and no coffee, so it didn’t occur to him until Laura asked. So, the guys name is James Barnes, he’s a friend of Cap’s, and has full access to parts of the Tower, which is weird considering how protective Tony is of the building. But Clint knows what he saw and how guarded Cap is around the team. After months and months, the guy still stays hold up in his apartment unless he’s out or with Stark.

If what Clint thinks it true then poor Cap needs a friend, a friend that truly understands. With two huge bags and a mountain of determination, Clint heads up to Cap’s floor. JARVIS did a check in and asked permission for Clint to be allowed up, so when the elevator opens, Cap’s standing there waiting. He looks at Clint, then at the bags. “Clint?”

“I hope you haven’t eaten because I gotta tell ya, I brought the goods.” He skirts around Cap and heads to the dining table. “I have this really bad habit.” He looks over his shoulder where Cap is standing obviously confused. “I love brunch, but I always get too much. You,” He points up and down at Cap’s body, “look like a man that can eat, so you’re going to help me eat this.” He pulls the two bottles of sparkling wine and the jug of orange juice out of one of the bags. “Is it true that you can’t get drunk?”

Cap seems overwhelmed with Clint’s mile a minute talking. “UH…yeah…that’s…yeah, that’s true.”

“Too bad, one of the best parts of brunch is the mimosas. Anyhoo, get some plates. We got food of all types.” Cap goes off to the kitchen and comes back with plates and utensils. “Ah, nice..sit…come on, sit.” Once everything is open and laid out, Cap’s looking ravenous. Clint smirks and takes a seat. “Oh, you weren’t going anywhere were you? This could take awhile.”

Cap barks out a laugh. “No, I wasn’t going anywhere.” They dig into the food and Clint lets the blond get about halfway through his plate and through two and a half mimosas before he starts talking off-handed.

“One of the things that Laura and I love is taking time on Saturdays to go into town for brunch. Coop watches his sister and Nate and Laura and I get to have some time just the two of us. Of course we have to take stuff home cause the kids get annoyed if we don’t.” Cap’s looking at him questioningly.

“Who’s Laura?” Clint looks back down at his plate and keeps eating.

“Oh, Laura is my wife and my alpha. Coop’s our oldest, then there’s Lila, and Nate’s the baby. He’ll be two soon.” Steve sputters and then Clint looks up. “You didn’t know? I thought everyone knew.”

If what Steve is hearing is correct, Clint Barton, Hawkeye, just admitted to Steve that he’s an omega. “N-no…I…I didn’t know.”

“I mean it’s not like it’s a big deal, but people make assumptions about us. So, everyone on the team is alphas except for me, it’s not like it matters.” Steve sits back in his chair. Clint stops eating and looks at Steve, narrowing his eyes. “It doesn’t matter to you does it? If it does, I can take my food and go somewhere else.”

“No! It doesn’t matter to me. I’m just surprised.” Steve picks up his glass and drains the contents, fixing another.

“When they first brought me in, they wanted to bond me to one of the others to ‘stabilize’ me. I told them to fuck off. Just because I’m an omega didn’t mean I needed an alpha to keep me grounded. I mean for god sakes, those antiquated ideas went out with petticoats.” Steve snorts at that because a little of that happened in his original time. “Anyway, I’d been with SHIELD for about a year and went undercover and met Laura.” Clint stops eating again and leans back, smiling. “Man, one look at her and my life turned upside down. Jesus, she was perfect in every way.”

“How long have you been together?” Steve’s just picking at his food now because he’s a tactical genius and knows that Clint knows something.

“Fourteen years and I wouldn’t trade anything for what I’ve got with her.” Clint uses his fork to point at Cap’s plate. “You should eat more.”

Steve picks up his fork and stares down at his plate. “You know, don’t you?”

Clint looks up. “I don’t know anything that you don’t want me to, but a word of caution.” Steve looks up. “Don’t scent whoever that guy is in a public place again if you don’t want others to figure it out.”

Steve starts to stand, but Clint’s hand on his arm stops him. “Cap…Steve…I don’t give a damn and I’m sure as hell not going to tell anyone. It’s not my story. Sure would have been nice to know I wasn’t alone though.”

Steve looks up, guilt written on his face. “It’s not what you think.”

“I have no right to think anything. I just brought food.” He smirks up at Steve, who takes a deep breath and tells Clint everything. When he’s done, Clint’s looking at him in awe. “I think you just became my favorite Avenger, but don’t tell Nat that I ever said that.”

Steve snorts. “You don’t think it’s weird?”

“Dude, you got your whole biology turned inside out and you’re still moving forward and getting help. I think you’re more of a hero now than when you were just Cap.” Steve blushes and finally goes back to eating. “And that man you were with, he’s okay with all of this?”

“Yeah, he’s helping me figure it out.” Clint just nods and they start talking about something else. 

“What is this?” Clint looks over at something that Steve put on his plate.

“That’s a crab stuffed omelet. You don’t like it?”

“Are you kidding! I want one of these every day!” They pick up their glasses and clink them together. “Brunch is awesome.”

And so, Steve ends up with another friend in his corner. A few days after his brunch with Clint, he tells Bucky about it. He’d checked with Clint about sharing the man’s status, but Clint told him that if Bucky could keep Steve’s secret, Clint trusted him too. “I had no idea that Clint was an omega and to find out he has an alpha wife and kids, it was just a shock.”

They’re walking by the river, but Bucky stops. Steve turns and there’s an odd look on his face. “Buck?”

Bucky waves his hands in front of his body and clinches his eyes shut. “Wait, are you telling me that,” Bucky looks around and lowers his voice, “Hawkeye has carried three kids and no one has noticed?”

Steve chuckles. “Apparently, each time Clint’s on an undercover op and can’t be reached.” Steve does air quotes at ‘undercover op’ making Bucky giggle. Steve watches him and the way his eyes crinkle and sighs. God, how is it possible that after all this time he finds himself in love? He had no idea that it would feel like this.

Bucky sees the look and tilts his head. “Steve?”

Steve looks down at the ground, blushing. “I love you and I don’t know what I did to deserve someone like you that’s…you’re just…understanding.” They haven’t done more than snuggle on a sofa while watching movies, but Steve has the desire to kiss the living daylights out of Bucky. So, he does.

The Avengers return from a short mission the day of Steve’s appointment and instead of showering and going to bed, he showers and heads out to see George. The mission was rough and Natasha didn’t make it any easier. She was invasive with her questions and comments, leaving Steve emotionally exhausted. Once at the Center, Steve feels like a weight is lifted from his shoulders when he opens the door and Bucky is at the counter. He turns, seeing Steve and the smile that he gets is pure…love. Everything feels better.

“Hey.” Instead of holding himself back, Steve falls into Bucky’s arms. “You okay?”

Steve nods into his neck and covertly rubs his nose along Bucky’s neck causing the man’s breath to hitch. “I’m okay now.”

He heads back to George’s office. The man stands, holding out his arms. “Steve! I wasn’t sure you’d make it.”

Because this is a safe space and Bucky isn’t there, Steve shuffles into George’s arms. “I needed to come today. It was a rough mission.”

George pulls back, looking at Steve’s face. “I’m going to assume that you mean rough emotionally and not physically.” Steve nods. “Let’s sit, I’ll get us some coffee and we’ll figure it out.”

Steve starts by telling George about Natasha. “I just don’t know how to deal with,” He looks down at the floor and realizes what the issue is, “with alphas that are like that.”

“Tell me what you mean by that.” Steve looks up and George is really interested. It isn’t said with a gleam of intrusiveness, but with really curiosity.

“It’s just that…well it’s…Bucky. He’s not like that. He’s not possessive or territorial.” George smiles and can’t cover that it’s a proud father smile.

“You aren’t either, Steve and you’re an alpha.” Steve’s never loved this man more. He’s become a friend and a father figure.

He gives a shy smile. “Yeah, but I never had a reason to be those things. No one ever wanted me.”

“Well, someone that really sees you wants you now.” Steve nods. “Now tell me about Natasha.”

Steve tells George about Black Widow and how she’s always trying to invade his life, asking questions, making comment, suggesting, in a very harsh way, that he needs to date and find himself a life. It was tenfold during the mission. “If not for Tony and Clint, I think I might have punched her.”

George bellows with laughter. “I doubt that. Doesn’t seem your style.” Steve chuckles and looks up, finally. “Why do you think she’s so invested in your personal life?”

“I don’t know. She doesn’t do it to anyone else. It’s like she thinks I can’t live my own life without someone running interference.” Steve gets up, going over to the window. “I know what I want.”

“Tell me, Steven. What do you want?” George waits with baited breath.

“I want a life with Bucky. I just don’t know how to do that.” Steve looks back over his shoulder.

George sighs. “Well, we’re still working on that. This wasn’t going to be an overnight process. You’ll get there, whatever that means for you. You’ll get there.” Bucky takes Steve for ice cream again and they walk through the streets, talking about the mission and Natasha.

“You know, you could just tell her to fuck off.” Steve barks a laugh and nearly drops his ice cream.

“I would, but I’m afraid that would really get her hackles up and she’d work double time trying to fix me up.” Bucky stops and takes a deep breath. Steve turns to see Bucky seemingly having a quiet conversation with himself. “Buck?”

Bucky’s eyes snap up to meet Steve’s and the super soldier knows what’s happening. As quickly as the realization comes to Steve, Bucky sees that he understands. “I’m sorry.”

Steve blushes, lowering his head and grins. “Nothin to be sorry for.”

Stepping closer, Bucky really looks at him. “Really?”

“I thought I’d be annoyed if you got…you know…possessive, but turns out, not so much.” Bucky turns Steve and they continue their walk.

Steve’s feeling pretty good about himself and life in general until a few days later. It’s early evening and he just doesn’t feel right. He thinks about going for a walk to expend some energy, but he doesn’t want to leave the comfort of his apartment.

‘Steven, are you well?’

JARVIS breaking the quiet makes Steve jump and the AI speaking hasn’t done that in awhile. “Uh, yeah, I’m just not feeling well.”

‘Sir, the serum makes it impossible for you to get sick.’

Steve’s confused and rubs his head, looking around. “Yeah, yeah, I know. Maybe I just need to do something.”

‘Steven, perhaps you would like to lie down.’

That sounds like an excellent idea all of the sudden and Steve goes into his room, but his bed doesn’t look right. Going to the hall closet, he gets every extra blanket and pillow there. Back in his bedroom, he starts piling everything on the bed, but that doesn’t look right either. Crawling onto the insanely, large bed, he starts arranging everything. Once he has it just right, he cuddles up and hugs a pillow to his chest and thinks about Bucky.

JARVIS has never invaded Captain Rogers’s privacy, but everything about this situation seems off. He places a call to the Center and then a second call to Mr. Barton. Clint’s off and running before he’s even thinking. Getting to Cap’s floor he can feel it in the air. It’s familiar.

Heading into the bedroom, Clint freezes. “Oh hell.” Steve’s head pops up and he gives a lazy smile and his eyes are glassy. “Cap,” Steve frowns at that and Clint changes tactics. “Steve, tell me how you’re feeling.”

He frowns at the concern in his friend’s voice. “Just edgy and a little tired.” Clint looks up at the ceiling and sighs. “What?”

Clint goes over to the bed and Steve nods for him to sit. “Steve, you told me that you’ve only ever had two,” He hesitates on the next word because he doesn’t want to set the blond man off. “Heats.”

Tony returns to the Tower and finds George and James Barnes at the security desk checking in. “Gentlemen, what brings you to my lively Tower?”

Bucky turns, surprised, but smiles. “We’re not sure. JARVIS called and said that something was going on with Steve. He suggested that my dad get over here.”

“Well that is strange.” He leads them to the elevator and after the doors close, Tony starts talking. “JARVIS, what’s going on?”

‘Sir, it would seem that Captain Rogers may be suffering from a…designation illness.’

George is the only one that doesn’t look confused. “Oh hell.”

Natasha returns to the building just as Tony is getting in the elevator with two men that she’s seen around with Cap. She tries to catch the elevator, but just as she gets to it, the doors snap shut a little quicker than normal. “JARVIS, where is Tony going?”

‘Up.’

JARVIS is programmed to always be respectful to the team, but he’s also programmed to protect them. That gets her mind racing because the two men are friends of Cap’s and Tony has suddenly taken a liking to their leader. It’s not adding up, so Natasha takes the elevator to the communal floor and finds it empty. “JARVIS, where is Captain Rogers?”

‘Captain Rogers is unable to have visitors at this time, Agent Romanov.’

Well, she knows that’s a lie because he just took three men to the Captain’s floor. ‘JARVIS, where’s Clint?” If anyone can help her with this, it’s Barton.

‘Mr. Barton is unavailable.’

Finding that a little too convenient, she goes to a terminal and pulls up the heat signatures for Cap’s floor and finds two in the bedroom and three standing in the living room. “Curiouser and Curiouser.” Heading to the nearest stairwell, she makes her way to the utility port two floors above Cap’s and climbs into the vent. “If it’s good enough for Barton, it’s good enough for me.”

Steve looks up at Clint and honest to god looks like he might throw up. “Oh god…” He rolls onto his back and then jumps off the bed. Clint has to step back or get crushed by the sudden movement. “I built a fucking nest…oh…nononono…not…I can’t… this isn’t…”

Clint goes to him, putting a hand to his forehead. “Yeah, and you’re heating up with a fever.” 

“This isn’t me!” Clint’s following him, but unsure what to do. “I’m not…I’m not this!” Steve’s had two ‘heats’ one back then and one after the Battle of New York, but during neither of them did he ever feel the need to build a fucking nest.

Clint gets a little offended by that. “Listen man, I know you don’t want this, but I go through this three times a year and you’re making it sound unnatural!”

Steve stops and just starts to sob. “But…but, I’ve…can’t...” His mood swings again and he looks furious. “This isn’t a big deal for you! You’re an omega!” He’s so caught in his own misery that he doesn’t even register how that might sound to Clint.

Clint gets just as angry. “So are you!” Clint meets him anger for anger.

Steve’s shoulders sag and he looks so defeated. “Only this body that betrayed me is omega. I’m…”

“What? Better than that? Because let me tell you something, asshole, being an omega means you have to be stronger than everyone around you! It means you have to carry the burden of every negative thing this society thinks about you! But I’ll tell you this, you bastard, if alphas had to carry kids and give birth, humans would have died out a long time ago! Being an omega means,” He pauses in his tirade, then nods, “yeah, being an omega means you’re better than everyone else!” Clint doesn’t really mean it the way it comes out, but Steve is pushing all his buttons.

Steve crumples to the ground just as the elevator opens. “I’m not strong enough.”

There’s a growl and everyone stops in their tracks as Bucky runs from the elevator to get to Steve. He doesn’t know why the man he loves is on the floor crying and doesn’t care. “Steve, Stevie.” He pulls Steve’s face up so he can see what’s wrong, but lifting the super soldier’s neck releases new pheromones into the room. Bucky growls again and Steve’s eyes dilate. “Baby.”

That one word does Steve in and he’s in Bucky’s arms, practically in his lap, burying his face in Bucky’s neck. “Buck, I’m scared.”

“Aw, baby, you have no reason to be scared. I’m going to be here with you.” Steve jumps from Bucky’s lap and backs away, crab crawling away from those words. Realizing what he implied, Bucky puts his hands up. “I didn’t mean that, Steve. I would never do that to you.”

George steps forward and Steve sees the only father figure he’s ever had, he gets up and runs to him. George wraps the man in his arms and Tony starts to step over. Clint grabs his arm to stop him. “You don’t want to do that. Dr. Barnes isn’t a threat, but you are.”

“Threat, what are you going on about, Barton.” Tony makes one more step and Bucky growls again, low and feral. “Oh, that’s…yeah…I’m going to be over here.” Everyone just stares at everyone else. “JARVIS, do a complete lock down of this floor until further notice and order everything that Steve is going to need.”

‘Already done, sir.’

George rubs up and down Steve’s back. “Now, now, Steven, it’s going to be okay.”

“Nothing is ever going to be okay.” Bucky just can’t take it anymore and sniffles, fighting back the tears over the absolute devastation this is causing Steve. Steve’s head whips around. He sees the state of _his_ alpha and runs back into Bucky’s arms. In his current state, he doesn’t even register that he thinks of Bucky that way. “I’m sorry.” The heat before the ice had been small, almost non-existent, the one after the ice had been his body readjusting. Both had been so miniscule that Steve had been able to ignore them. This one isn’t going to be that way and Steve can feel that. It’s already driven his instincts to build a nest which has never happened. In a clearer state of mind he might wonder if it’s because of Bucky, because he has an alpha now.

There’s a strange noise from the ceiling and the vent cover pops off and Natasha Romanov lands in a crouch. “What’s going on, boys?”

Having Tony in the room is bad enough, but when a young, attractive alpha lands on the floor, everything that Bucky tries so hard, every damn day, to tamp down around Steve, comes roaring to the surface. The woman stalks forward in what appears to be a challenge and Bucky pulls Steve behind him and lets out a low threatening growl. Natasha doesn’t stop moving towards the two men even with everyone else yelling at her to back off. Seeing no real threat, she doesn’t listen. Before Bucky leaps at her, Clint tackles her to the ground. She looks up at him like he’s lost his mind. “Sometimes you truly are the stupidest person I’ve ever met.”

She balks at that. “What the hell is wrong with you, Barton?”

“Not even you can take on a feral alpha, Nat.” He stands. “Get up very slowly and move to the other side of the room or I’ll take you out myself.”

Looking at the situation in front of her, Nat looks over at Clint shocked. “But…who…”

Tony gets defensive and edges around behind George, in a standoff with Nat. “It’s none of your damn business and for once maybe you should have just left it alone, but you just can’t help yourself.” Something protective flares in Tony and he’ll be damned if he’s going to let Steve or Bucky be put in a position that causes more pain for either of them.

Bucky turns around to see how badly he offended Steve by what he just did, but Steve’s just staring at him in awe. “You…you protected me.”

Bucky’s eyes close in disbelief. “Of course I did. I love you.”

“I love you too.” Steve doesn’t really understand what’s happening inside of him, but suddenly he feels…soft. No one ever took care of him when he was little except his Ma and since coming out of the ice, no one thought they had to. 

George sees that his son and Steve need to figure this out. “I think we should go. These two need time to talk this out.”

Clint looks over at Tony, whose shaking his head. “Is that really the best thing?”

Tony seems to agree, but when they look over at the two men, for Steve and Bucky, everyone else has already disappeared. “They are grown men that have to face some of the challenges alone.” George looks over at Natasha. “And you and I are going to have a long talk about your need to control every situation. Seems to me young lady, that you need some boundaries.”

Clint snorts and drags her to the elevator. Tony and George follow them in. “JARVIS, no one else gets on the floor until Steve gives the ok.”

‘He will be safe, sir.’

The elevator doors open and all three are talking at once. Natasha is trying to get the information she wants, or at least have someone confirm what she’s starting to suspect. Tony is yelling about redesigning the ventilation system in the Tower to keep this from happening again. Clint is telling Natasha to shut up and stop being such a damn spy and George is scared shitless because Steve and Bucky do have to navigate this themselves, but it doesn’t change the fact that he’s concerned.

“For god sakes Nat, coming in through the vent at Steve’s was just…it was an asshole move!” Clint’s not listening to her because it all boils down to the fact that she ‘needs’ to know everything even when it’s not her place.

Bruce comes out of the kitchen with a cup of tea, hearing Clint’s statement. “You did what?!” Nat looks over quirking an eyebrow. “Don’t you have _any_ boundaries?”

George walks over to Bruce, offering his hand. Bruce takes is hesitantly. “I’m Dr. Barnes and I’ve been telling her the same thing.”

“What are you a doctor of? Do you work for Tony?” The other conversations have stopped in lieu of the new one. Nat wants to know who these people are too.

“Oh no, I’m a doctor of psychology and I work in Brooklyn. I’m Steve’s therapist.” Nat goes to open her mouth and question this new information when Tony and Clint grab her arms, pulling her back a few feet.

Clint’s finger in her face is only tolerated because of their friendship. “NO! Until the people involved willingly give you the information, you are not going to ask questions that you have no damn business having the answers to.” Clint paces away then turns back with his hands on his hips. “If you don’t let this go, don’t come to the farm again. You aren’t welcome.”

That shuts her up. “Why is this so important to you? Why do you care so much?”

George comes over, patting Clint’s back affectionately. “You are a good man for being so protective.”

Clint shakes his head. “I’m just so fucking tired of this damn group of asshole alphas thinking they need to be in everyone’s business.”

Bruce raises his hand. “I’m a beta.”

Steve pulls Bucky towards his bedroom because he’s not feeling well. He doesn’t really know what to do with these instincts, but he’s built a nest and he might as well use it. He did feel good when he was in it and he is starting to feel that fuzzy feeling again.

Once inside the room, Bucky freezes at what’s on the bed, Steve stops, looking back at the man. Bucky’s got to tread very carefully with this new situation. Steve’s an alpha in his heart and mind, but something in his unwanted instincts caused him to build a nest. Taking a deep breath, closing his eyes Bucky decides that he can be what Steve needs right now and if Steve needs a nest, then Bucky can respect that. He draws Steve to the bed and once the blond is cuddled in the blankets, Bucky kneels down next to the bed.

“What are you doing?” Steve’s face is flushed and his eyes have gone glassy again. 

For several minutes, Bucky doesn’t say anything because he needs to find a way to say this without setting Steve off again. “Baby, listen to me, you don’t understand how these things work because you’re an alpha, but no one comes into a nest without permission. You remember that, right? I can’t get in there with you because I…”

Steve wipes a hand across his forehead. He’s sweating and can’t seem to get comfortable. Sitting up, he hangs his head. “I think we can both agree that I’m not completely an alpha. This situation proves that.” Bucky starts to interrupt, but Steve shakes his head. “Bucky, like it or not, understand it or not, my designation is complicated.”

It’s been almost a year of therapy and Steve sees now what George was trying to do. Steve needs to respect both of his identities. George knew that being an alpha would always be part of Steve, but he had to get Steve to a point that he accepted that there was another part too. “Steve, I’m not sure how to think of you that way.”

Steve gives a chuckle. “Well, you don’t have to, but you do have to admit that your instincts kicked in back there too. You treated me like an omega. Something in you recognizes that part of me too.” He takes Bucky’s hand, pulling him to his feet. “Now, get those shoes off because you’re not getting in my nest wearing them.”

Bucky does as he’s told and climbs onto the bed. Getting comfortable, Steve snuggles against him like they’ve done many times before on the sofa. Steve falls into a restless sleep and Bucky vows to hold him for as long as he needs. Waking in the night, Steve cries into the alphas neck. “Sssshhhh, baby, everything is going to be okay. I’m here and you’re not getting rid of me.” Steve just snuggles closer and Bucky can hear him mumbling about being confused and grasping at Bucky harder.

The next morning, George comes back up at Steve’s invitation. Neither of the younger men look well rested, so they sit sharing coffee. His son and Steve keep glancing at each other and George is worried that something happened the night before that neither are willing to talk about. He knows his son and is sure that Bucky wouldn’t have forced Steve to do anything. George can tell that Steve’s still in heat, but trying to cover it. “What would you like to talk about?”

Steve sighs. “George, I need to figure out how to reconcile who I’ve always been with who I am now.”

“And who are you, Steven?” Bucky watches his father then cuts his eyes to Steve again.

“I’m an alpha and an omega and I don’t want to hate any part of myself anymore.” George beams at him.

Steve’s heat lasts four days and Bucky doesn’t leave him. On the morning of the fifth day, Bucky’s in the kitchen making coffee. Steve comes in, wrapping himself around Bucky from behind. “How can I be this tired after spending four days in bed?”

Bucky snorts. “You spent four days in heat, Steve. It’s very different than getting actual rest.” All four nights Bucky would wake with Steve crying. It tore his heart out because all Steve would tell him is how confusing it all felt. There was no real rest for either of them. So, he waits to see what Steve’s response will be to his comment.

“I don’t know how Clint does _this_ three times a year.” Without thinking, Bucky responds with probably the worst thing that he could say.

“Well, Clint has an alpha wife too and the physical relationship is supposed to be better for the omega.” He stiffens and wants to punch himself in the face for saying it.

He expects Steve to step away, yell at him, something, but instead he gets, “Well maybe next time you can be here and not just lay there.” Steve’s hand slaps over his mouth with the implications of that.

Bucky turns to looks at him. “Steve?”

Steve walks away and stops at the entrance to the kitchen. “Look Buck, you’ve been patient and really good to me. I guess if I’m going to trust anyone with that part of who I am, it’s going to be you.” Turning back, he looks at the brunet. “I’m in love with you and even though I haven’t done anything with anyone before, you protecting me and being here just made me realize that it might be time to really looks at what this all will mean.”

“That’s some romantic shit right there, Rogers.” Steve barks a laugh at Bucky’s sarcasm and comes back across the kitchen. “If you’re sure and only if you’re sure because I love you too.” The thing they both know is they have time. Steve won’t go through this again for months and in that time he hopes that he can come to a mutual respect of both parts of who he is and Bucky will stay with him because god does he want Bucky to keep wanting him. Bucky reaches up and Steve nods. It’s a different kind of kiss than they’re used to. Before it was affection, this one is a promise.


	3. Chapter 3

As the months pass, Steve and Bucky spend more time together. Bucky comes to the Tower, with his brand new security card and Steve goes to Bucky’s apartment in Brooklyn. It’s in an older building, but still miles better than anything Steve lived in back in the 20th Century. He goes to his counseling appointments at the Center and he has to admit, things are starting to feel better. He’s still an alpha in an omega body, but he’s learning to accept that about himself.

He also does something that surprises everyone that knows, he allows himself to be soft. He’s never allowed that outside of what he does in private with Bucky. Now, when the team has a movie night, Steve goes and sits on the sofa between Bruce and Clint and before the night is over, blankets are piled around them and Steve’s head will be in Bruce’s lap or on Clint’s shoulder. No one has said anything to Natasha, but if she tries to sit too close to Steve, he edges away. The one time, and only one time, that he cuddles with Tony, Bucky growls about it when Steve tells him. “You’re sounding a little possessive.”

Bucky just hangs his head. “I’m sorry. I really am working on it. Alpha, omega, or in between, you bring it out in me.” It seems that the more Steve accepts his situation, Bucky has to work even harder not to be something Steve will resent.

Steve turns to look at him and for the first time and understands how unfair he’s acting. “Bucky?” The man’s head shoots up, thinking he’s in trouble. “Why do you hold yourself back like that?”

Bucky scrunches up his face in confusion. “Steve, you don’t need me getting territorial on you. Hell, you can protect yourself and me at the same time.”

“Yeah, but maybe sometimes I don’t want to have to protect myself. Maybe sometimes I like that you want to.” That confuses Bucky even more and over the months it just gets more mystifying.

“What did you mean when you told Bucky that?” George doesn’t get into the inner workings of their relationship, but Steve needed to talk about it. So, here they are. 

Steve looks down at his hands in his lap. “It’s like when I was having that heat and Bucky protected me against Natasha…I mean…I know why he was doing it, but it felt good.” He looks over at George. “When I was little, before the serum, I was always trying to prove myself. Then I got the serum and I was supposed to be in charge all the time.”

“I bet that’s exhausting.” Steve barks a laugh, causing George to join him.

“You have no idea. I like my job, but when I’m not doing my job, it’s nice to have someone else doing the hard stuff.” George pats his hand and Steve latches hold.

“Sometimes Steven, you need to turn that off. Sometimes you need to let someone take care of you. It’s okay to want that.” Steve sniffles trying to fight back getting misty. He feels like he’s been waiting for someone to give him permission.

Six months have come and gone and still Steve doesn’t have another heat. He starts to think it was just a fluke. The Avengers return from a mission and on the way back, he sends Bucky a text. When they arrive back at the Tower, Bucky’s waiting with a hot bath and food. Natasha watches them walk away arm in arm. “Why doesn’t he trust me?”

Clint cackles at that. “Nat, you never tell anyone anything unless you’re going to get something out of it.”

“I’ve been honest with you.” Clint’s eyes soften and he puts a hand on her back, leading her inside.

“But you want him to open up to you and you aren’t willing to do the same. With me, you had to be honest or I was going to shoot you.” That causes the red head to cackle. “When you stop wanting the information from Steve just to have it in your arsenal, then you’re ready to have an honest conversation with him.”

Bruce follows them in and even though Cap hasn’t told him anything either, he’s very aware of what’s going on. He’s sure that Natasha is too, but it’s one thing to know it and another thing to hear it. Bruce can wait.

The mission ended two days ago and Steve’s been spending most of his time hold up in his apartment. He went through the debrief, that lasted entirely longer than it should have, then packs a bag to leave the tower. It isn’t that the mission was any harder than the others, but he’s just feeling tired and worn down. On his way out, he stops by the lab and lets Tony know where he’s going to be.

“You feeling alright, Steve?” Steve looks up from where he’s gotten distracted by a tool on the bench.

“Oh…uh…yeah, just need some down time.” Something about it feels off to the billionaire, but he can’t put his finger on what it is. He’s seen Steve upset, depressed, withdrawn, but this is a whole other level of…whatever it is. 

“Listen, you take all the time you need. Gotta have you up and ready to go the next time some asshole tries to take over. Right?” Steve gives a weak smile and exits the building. Looking at his bike, he just doesn’t feel it today.

“JARVIS, is there a car service or something I can use?” Steve looks down at his phone and sighs.

‘Of course. I’ll send a driver to you.’ There’s pause. ‘Steven, are you well?’

Steve sighs again, but this time it’s shaky. He’s never been like this after a mission. “Uh…I’m not sure. I just really want to get to Bucky’s and I don’t feel like driving.” A car comes around and Happy jumps out to open the door. “Thanks JARVIS.” Looking up, he tries to smile at Happy, but he’s sure it doesn’t come out that way. “Thanks Happy.”

The drive over is quiet, but Steve is very aware that Happy is watching him in the mirror. Thankfully, he doesn’t say anything or ask any questions. Getting into Bucky’s building is easy since Steve has the code and makes his way to the top floor. He knocks first, but knows that he can use the key if Bucky’s isn’t home. The door swings open and Bucky’s smiling face greets him. When he sees the situation, he draws Steve into the apartment, hugging him close.

“What’s goin on, sweetheart?” All the tension in Steve’s body gives and he sinks into the embrace.

“Don’t know. Just feel…I don’t know.” Bucky pulls back, cupping Steve’s face and kissing his forehead.

“Tell me what you need and it’s yours.” Steve nuzzles into the touch and closes his eyes. The body language tells Bucky everything he needs to know. “How about I run a bath and while you relax, I’ll call out for some food. Then we just cuddle up on the sofa and watch something mindless.”

Steve nods and follows Bucky into the bedroom. By the time Steve’s put his extra clothes away and lays the sketch pad and pencils on the side table, Bucky’s got the tub almost ready. Now that he’s here, he’s pretty sure he knows what’s going on. He’s not completely sure, but it’s a good bet.

When Steve steps into the bathroom, Bucky’s drying his hands and headed out the door. Grabbing his wrist, Steve looks at him. “Don’t go.” The biggest issue for both of them is Steve is asking for something that they’ve never done. Seeing each other without a shirt is normal, but they’ve never undressed completely in front of the other. 

“You sure?” Steve nods and starts to pull the clothes off that have felt constraining all day. Bucky leans against the sink and crosses his arms over his chest. It’s a defensive posture because it’s one thing to feel Steve’s body against him, it’s quite another to see everything under the clothes. Steve doesn’t seem to have any reservation and when he gets to his briefs, he pushes them to the floor and looks over his shoulder shyly. Bucky loses his breath. Steve is built like an alpha dream, but the shy look on his face is so very omega and Bucky’s hind brain drinks it in greedily. “Damn.” Offering his hand, he helps Steve step into the tub and get settled. Kneeling next to the tub he pulls Steve’s hand to his lips and kisses it reverently. “Thank you.”

Steve’s blush runs down his chest and disappears under the water. “For what?” Those blue eyes look up at Bucky so vulnerable.

“For trusting me. For loving me. For letting me take care of you when you need.” Steve draws him closer and kisses him.

“Get in with me. I don’t feel like I want to be too far from you right now.” Bucky just nods and undresses too. Steve watches every move as every article of clothing is removed and tossed into the pile with his own. He sees parts of the man he loves that are new and he drinks it in. “Fuck, Bucky…you’re beautiful.”

The alpha blushes and starts to climb into the opposite end of the oversized tub. Steve shakes his head and moves forward. If Bucky wasn’t sure of Steve’s mental state, he is now. Something’s definitely up, but if this is what Steve needs then Bucky’s going to give it to him. Sinking into the water behind Steve, he wraps the man up in his arms. The sigh Steve releases is different than the others, this one breathes out contentment and again, Bucky’s hind brain eats that up. His forebrain feels pretty damned good about it too. He strokes along Steve’s arms and up to his chest. “What do you feel like eating?”

Steve is so thankful that Bucky isn’t drawing attention to this neediness, so he reclines fully into his alpha’s chest, closing his eyes and letting himself feel everything. “Indian. Want that Tikka Masala.”

“Then that’s what we’ll have, baby.” The endearments have been slipping out since Steve arrived and every time it happens Steve’s body seems to relax more.

Bucky knows how Steve can get. Over their months together he understands that sometimes Steve needs someone to take care of him and Bucky’s ecstatic that the blond chose him. He loves the man in his arms more than he thought possible and everything that Steve thinks is too challenging, Bucky sees as their journey together. “Love you.” It’s a quiet little thing and not nearly the first time that Steve’s said it, but something in it is softer, it’s just more.

“Oh, my love, you have no idea how much I love you.” Bucky lets them soak for awhile, then washes Steve’s hair for him. As his fingers run through the golden strands, massaging the scalp, Steve hums and falls into the feeling.

But then, something happens that Bucky isn’t prepared for. Doesn’t know how to handle and really wishes that his inner alpha didn’t like it so much.

Steve purrs.

And the alpha in Bucky responds.

That’s when Bucky knows what this is. He rinses Steve’s hair and the omega turns, and starts washing Bucky’s in return. All the while purring. He doesn’t seem to know that he’s doing it, so Bucky doesn’t point it out. Bucky’s responding rumble doesn’t deter Steve’s actions and he keeps massaging the alpha’s scalp. Once rinsed, Steve uses the body wash and bathes Bucky and as many times as they’ve cuddled on the sofa, snuggled in bed, nothing is more intimate than an alpha and omega taking care of each other in this way. It’s usually prelude to more. Bucky freezes up.

“Buck, what’s wrong?” Bucky’s nine kinds of embarrassed because of where his thoughts just went.

“Sweetheart, do you know what you’re doing?” Steve cocks his head to the side and scrunches up his forehead.

He knows that Bucky isn’t talking about the bathing, exactly, so he must be talking about…OH…. “You mean the purring? Yeah, I know.”

“And the bathing?” They lock eyes and Bucky knows that Steve knows. “You know what’s happening.”

It’s Steve’s turn to blush. “Yeah, I knew as soon as I got here and saw you.” He lowers his eyes and it’s part embarrassment and part Steve being submissive.

Bucky takes his chin in his hand, raising his eyes. “Never submit to me like that again. Never go against your alpha nature because you think it’s what I want from the omega part of you. I want all of you and I see myself as damn lucky that you let me see any part of you.”

Steve starts and stops several times before he gets the words out. “I didn’t know what this was until I got here. I talked to one of the doctor’s at the Center a few months back when I didn’t have another heat. She said this one might be…more.”

“What do you mean?” Bucky reaches over, caressing Steve’s neck.

“The one I had after coming out of the ice was minimal, but I knew what it was. The one I had after that, with you there, was a little more…intense, but she warned that…well she said…I may not be able to get through it like last time. I might…need…” He swallows thickly and Bucky sees the strain it’s taking on him.

“Help?” Steve nods quickly. “Baby, listen to me.” Steve’s eyes come up to meet his again. “I’ll do anything you want, but only what you’re comfortable with. I would never force something you aren’t ready for.”

“That’s the thing, Buck, I think I am.” It’s Bucky’s turn to swallow thickly and look for any sign that Steve’s unsure. There’s nothing, just that honest, hopeful look. They rinse off and Bucky pulls Steve from the tub and starts to dry him. The purring starts up again and Bucky rumbles along with him. He draws all those miles of perfect skin into the bedroom, grinning. Going to the closet, he pulls bags and bags from the back. 

“Everything is clean, I washed it as soon as I brought it home, but I thought…you know…if this happened…yeah.” Steve peeks into the bags and suddenly the room is blooming with a scent that Bucky’s only smelled once, but this time it’s oozing into everything around them, especially Bucky’s senses. Happy omega scent fills the room as Steve pulls the extra pillows and blankets from the bags. He watches as Steve climbs onto the bed, naked as the day he was born, and starts constructing a nest. This time his eyes are clear, he knows exactly what he’s doing. Bucky slips on some sweats from the dresser and goes to get his phone. Not only does he order the food, he contacts Tony, Clint, and his father. If a mission comes up, Steve’s not going and if he has a breakdown, George agrees to come.

Stepping back into the bedroom, Steve looks up, smiling so bright. “These are so soft.” He’s almost giddy with excitement. He’s doing fine right now, but Bucky is sure that his skin will start to flush and instinct will take over. He’s got to be sure that Steve is ready for that and that they don’t do things that the alpha part of Steve doesn’t want. It must show in his face. “What? What is that look for?”

“Steve, before this really kicks in, we should talk about what you expect.” He watches as Steve sits down in the middle of what he’s building on the bed and plays with one of the pillows. Not once does he try to cover himself and boy is Bucky getting distracted. He’s definitely built like an alpha, but there is one difference. One that Bucky, somehow, wasn’t expecting. 

“Bucky.” He’s on the bed before Steve can get his name out completely. “When I got here and realized what this was, I let myself…well…I decided to embrace the instincts. I wasn’t expecting my alpha side to go so quiet.” Bucky is confused by that. “See, I spend so much time trying to be the alpha that everyone expects, that _I_ expect, but I have to also respect the omega side too. And this, this is _all_ my omega side.” He kind of chuckles to himself, making Bucky smile. “I don’t think…I don’t want…” Steve blushes, but clears his throat and squares his shoulders, “I don’t want you to mount me.” Bucky tries, he really does, but that visual gets him. “I want to see you. I want to look at you.” And _that_ visual gets to him even more.

Bucky nods his head and wheezes out. “Yeah…yeah…okay.” The knock on the door startles them both and Bucky leaves Steve to finish what he started to get the food. Steve slips into a pair of shorts and they eat on the sofa while something plays on the TV. Crawling in bed that night, Steve practically lays on top of Bucky. No matter how close they’ve slept before, Steve needs to be closer. It’s coming. This heat is coming and it’s not like last time, this time, Bucky’s going to be there for his…omega.

Sometime in the night, Steve strips his clothes off and when Bucky reaches over to check on him, his skin has heated up and he’s sweating. “Steve…baby?”

There’s a whine next to him and then Steve is crawling on top of Bucky. “It hurts, Buck.”

Bucky sighs and rubs up and down Steve’s back. “Tell me what you need.” Steve grinds down on Bucky and the alpha realizes that he’s hard. The scent in the room must have set him off and he groans. “Jesus, baby.” Steve whimpers and sits up to straddle Bucky. That gives the alpha an idea. “Steve, I have an idea.” He moves Steve off of him, causing more whimpers, but gets up and strips his own clothes off. Getting back in the bed, he pulls Steve on top of him. “Can I touch you?”

Steve looks down at him. “Yes.” Bucky runs his hands down Steve’s back and when he reaches the globes of the man’s ass, he slips a finger between his cheeks.

The slick is abundant and Bucky moans at the feel. He never actually thought that Steve would get to this point, but now that he is, Bucky is controlling himself more than he ever has before. Going a little further down, he tests the opening and finds it loose and waiting. “Oh god, Steve.” Looking down at Bucky, Steve gives a smile. It’s one that tells Bucky he wants this. “Okay, you have all the control here. You want to see me and I want to see you too, so you take charge and do what feels right for you.” It’s said through clinched teeth because all he wants to do is slam inside of the man and claim him.

Steve nods and slides his hips back. Bucky holds himself in hand. The second that his cock touches Steve’s opening, they both groan and Bucky’s sure his eyes roll back in his head. The head slips in and Steve’s eyes widen. “Bucky, I…” That’s all he gets out before taking the rest of the alpha’s cock into his body. 

Bucky clutches Steve’s hips, just needing a second to deal with the overwhelming sensation of being inside of Steve. “Baby, you’re perfect.” He’s not going to last before his knot pops and they haven’t talked about that. Holding Steve steady, he looks up into the face of the man that he loves and Bucky grits out. “Do…jesus…do you want me…do you want my knot?”

In answer, Steve sits up and grinds his hips and Bucky nearly loses his resolve. Rising up, Steve slams back down. “YES!” Bucky could feel self-satisfied by Steve’s enjoyment of the feeling, but instead he’s amazed at this man. He’s the most beautiful thing that Bucky’s ever seen and he watches as Steve takes what he needs in awe.

When the knot locks into place, Steve comes over Bucky’s chest and collapses. “Fuck…okay…are you okay?” Bucky wants to laugh and cry and everything in between.

Steve just nods his head where it rests under Bucky’s chin and then a contented, “yeah, I’m good,” comes out followed by a chuckle.

“What? What’s so funny?” Bucky can’t keep his hands to himself and starts rubbing Steve’s back again and gets a hum. 

Steve leans up, crossing his arms over Bucky’s chest and rests his chin on them looking up into Bucky’s twinkling eyes. “We’re doing that again.”

Bucky grins. “Well, this is probably going to last a few days, at least, so yeah we will.”

“No, I mean even when I’m not like this. We’re doing this a lot.” That makes Bucky laugh, overjoyed that there’s not trauma happening. It could be coming though and Bucky needs to be prepared for that.

“You sure you’re okay with this?” He has to ask because Steve fought so hard to be seen.

Leaning up, he kisses Bucky’s chin. “Yeah, I’m sure I’m okay.” The knot goes down a little later, but Steve doesn’t move. He stays on Bucky’s chest the rest of the night.

Bucky doesn’t sleep much and just listens to the soft breathing of this man that he’s no longer sure what to call. By morning, Steve is in a frenzy again and Bucky wakes to Steve sitting up and moving his hips around. Once that knotting is over, Bucky gets him into the shower and fed.

There’s a text from George later that morning. ‘How is everything? How is Steve?’

Bucky’s response is quick and to the point because Steve is pulling him back to the nest. ‘He’s good and seems happy.’

Four days later, Bucky is gathering the blankets from the bed for the wash while Steve soaks in the tub. They’ve been left alone for those days and Steve seems content. More than that, he seems happier than he’s been in a long time. “Steve, honey, do you want me to order something to eat?”

“God yeah, that would be great. Can we have waffles? I really want waffles.” Bucky chuckles.

As he leaves the bedroom with the first load he calls out, “I’ll get you waffles.”

George watches Steve intently to see if he’s trying to cover anything. His back is to the doctor as he stares out the window, but his shoulders aren’t tense. “I mean, I get it, I’m an alpha and my body turned on me, but it wasn’t like that at all. I just sorta let go and let the instincts carry me and everything turned out,” Steve turns and blushes realizing again that he’s talking to Bucky’s dad, “it turned out better than I thought.”

George can’t help the grin. “Okay, I know that you have trouble talking to me about things that have to do with my son, but I’m not asking for…details.” Steve smirks and George chuckles. “I’m asking how you feel now that it’s over. I’m asking do you feel betrayed by your body. I’m asking if you’re feeling any sort of trauma from what happened.”

Steve sits down again. “I had a heat, George. The omega part of my body went into heat and my…Bucky helped me through it.”

It doesn’t get past George what Steve almost said. “Steve?”

The super soldier knows exactly what George is asking. “I’m sorry. That was overstepping.”

That causes George to burst with laughter. “Oh…Christ on a cracker…you and my son are hopeless.” Pulling Steve up from the chair, he drags him down the hallway to the kitchen. Bucky is setting up food and looks up surprised because Steve’s appointment should be another 20 minutes.

“Dad? Steve?” George holds up his hand to silence them both.

“James Buchannan Barnes, I want you to look this man in the eyes and tell him what you told me the day he left your apartment!” Bucky looks like a deer caught in headlights and is shaking his head. “I swear to you, if you don’t tell him now, I will tell your grandmother what you really did the night of your high school graduation!”

Bucky’s eyes shoot up. “Pop, you wouldn’t?”

“Oh yes I will!” Steve looks amused and is definitely going to ask what Bucky did the night of his graduation. George looks over at Steve. “Don’t get too high and mighty, mister, because you’re going to tell him what you just almost said in my office.”

It’s Steve’s turn to look horrified. Looking between the two men, Bucky’s very confused. “Dad?”

George’s hand goes up. His voice softens and he notices that other counselors and lawyers have started looking into the kitchen to see what the uproar is about. “Tell him, Bucky.” George shoos the others away from the door and bar.

Bucky’s shoulders slump and he starts playing with a napkin on the table so he doesn’t have to looks at Steve. “You left my apartment that day and it felt empty and I didn’t like it. I went home to see dad and talk about it.” Bucky looks up and truly looks hurt. “Please don’t hate me, Stevie, but I told him that I knew, in my heart that you’re my mate. I know it as sure as…” Nothing else comes out of his mouth because it’s busy being assaulted by Steve.

Pulling back, Steve rests his forehead against Bucky’s, idly playing with the hem of the alpha’s shirt. “I almost called you my mate in your dad’s office.” He finally looks into Bucky’s eyes. “I think I’ve known it since you took me for ice cream, but I wasn’t ready to say it.”

“I love you, Steve. God how I love you.”

“I love you too.” He leans in, whispering for just Bucky to hear. “Alpha.” Bucky’s legs nearly give out.

Steve expected to feel something horrific after his heat. He expected more than anything to be horrified at himself and his behavior. He expected to have some kind of backlash from just letting go and letting the omega side of him take over, but it didn’t happen. He’s sure, as sure as he’s sitting here in the common room of the Tower, that if had been anyone other than Bucky, he wouldn’t feel okay about it. The elevator opens and the rest of the team comes into the room and Steve’s back stiffens. Bucky comes out of the kitchen carrying tea for both of them.

Clint plops down in the seat on one side of Steve as Bucky takes his other side. Tony knows, he can see it in Steve’s eyes that are darting all over the room, that the secret is about to come out. “Well Capalisious, what’s all this about?”

Steve claps his hands in front of him and rubs them together. Reaching to the table, he takes his glass and busies himself drinking. Bucky’s hand lands on his back and everything in him relaxes. “Some of you know this and some of you suspect this and one of you has no idea what’s going on.” Steve looks up at Thor who’s just grinning. “I wasn’t ready to say it and it’s still hard to say, but it’s time.”

Bucky leans up, kissing Steve’s shoulder and letting the super soldier breathe. “Take your time and stop if it gets to be too much.”

The elevator opens again and George comes in. “Hey Doc!” George waves at Clint and looks around the room at the faces of the people that Steve has chosen to trust. He takes a seat by the window and watches his son’s mate.

Steve takes a cleansing breath and starts. “Peggy kept everything secret because she knew what would happen if she didn’t. And it isn’t like things are bad anymore, but back then they were. Besides Peggy, Dr. Erskine was the only other one that knew for sure.” He looks up and sees all eyes are watching him, some in appreciation for his bravery and some in curiosity. “I was born an alpha and lived as an alpha, but the serum changed everything about me including my designation.” 

Natasha sits forward, but instead of the twinkle of the calculating Black Widow, she’s got empathy. “So, it really did change you into an omega?”

“Yeah, and I’ve never been able to accept that part of myself. I resented it…hated it.” He looks over at his mate’s father. “Then I met George and he’s been helping me understand both parts of myself.” Leaning over, he rests his forehead against Bucky’s temple. “And I met Bucky and he’s accepted everything about me, including things that I struggled with.” Looking back at his team, he smiles. “I want to trust you and I want this to be something the team knows and understands, but I can’t stop any of you from telling the world about me. I’m an alpha and an omega.”

Clint bumps his shoulder with Steve’s. “Why is it anyone’s business? We aren’t keeping a secret, we’re just being your family.”

Steve nods, but keeps his head down. “Natasha, I couldn’t say this to you because I didn’t trust you. I thought you’d use it against me, think of me as weak.”

They can all tell that she’s hurt by that, but she understands why. “Cap…Steve, in my life I’ve come in contact with all designations, but the ones that fight the hardest, that almost always win in a fight are omegas. They’re the backbone of society no matter what society says. I don’t know how to make friends, never did, until Clint came along. I didn’t mean to make you fear for your secret because of me.”

“It’s taken time, but I’m starting to understand that being one or the other isn’t how I can live. I have to be both or I’ll be no good to anyone.” Bucky leans in and whispers something in Steve’s ear making the super soldier smile so warmly at him that the other’s believe they are intruding. “Bucky and I are going to mate and I want all of you there.”

There’s a huge group hug and after congratulations are given and more hugs are accepted, Tony orders enough food for an army. He corners Steve later. “I want you to have the ceremony here. Not just because it’s safe and secure, which it is, but because this place…Steve this place will always be a home for you.”


	4. Chapter 4

“Rogers, what are you wearing?” Natasha storms into the room carrying a hanging bag. “I leave you alone for two minutes and I come back to you wearing sweat pants.” 

“Nat, I was just going out to get the suit and I threw these on.” Steve goes for the bag and she pulls it away.

“For three months I’ve been trying to make this day as perfect as it can be and you forget your suit.” The apartment door opens and Tony comes in with Clint in tow. “What do you two want that is going to piss me off?”

They both freeze. “You do know that I own this building, right? And I let you live here out of the goodness of my heart.” Natasha quirks an eyebrow at that.

The room falls into a fit of giggles. Steve snatches the bag and heads into the bedroom. Closing the door behind him, he sits on the edge of the bed. He needs just a couple of minutes to himself because today is his mating day and that makes him happier than he thought he would ever be considering the uphill battle his life has been since the serum and even before, but what’s sitting on the bathroom counter might hang a grey cloud above the whole day. There’s a light knock on the door. “Yeah?”

It clicks open and Clint is peaking in. Seeing that Steve isn’t getting dressed like he said, Clint knows his friend is overwhelmed. “You alright?” Steve waves to him. “Goddamnit you harpy, get away. A man has a right to dress himself without you judging everything he’s doing.” Nat cackles behind him, but walks away. Clint comes in and sits on the end of the bed. Steve looks up to make sure the door is closed. Nothing is missed by Hawkeye.

Steve tries a few times to open his mouth and say it out loud, but nothing comes out. “JARVIS?” His AI friend has been a god-send for the last twenty-four hours. Without him, Steve would be in a crumpled heap in the corner.

If not for the AI, he would have run for the hills earlier this morning. ‘Sir, Steven confirmed a piece of news this morning and is finding it difficult to articulate. If you would be so kind as to go into the bathroom.’

Clint gets up and heads where he’s been instructed. Coming out his holds the offending stick. “Steve?”

Steve looks up, having been staring intently at the floor, and Clint can see how red his eyes are just from the last few minutes in the bedroom. “Yeah.” Clint doesn’t speak yet, he wants to gage this situation before he offers congratulations or consolation. “I suspected something was…wrong…and JARVIS suggested that I…you know.”

‘After careful monitoring Steven’s vitals, it occurred to me that he may be…in this condition.’ Steve huffs because he instructed JARVIS not to use the word. He wasn’t ready to hear it.

Clint comes over, sitting on the bed and rubbing Steve’s back while staring at the stick. “What do you want to do?”

Everything in Clint screams at the idea, but Steve wasn’t born an omega, he doesn’t really understand the connection that an omega feels to their body. “What do you mean?”

Steve looks up confused and Clint realizes that the super soldier really doesn’t understand his options. And as much as Clint doesn’t want to be the one to give him that information, he has an obligation to his friend and that friend’s well-being. “Steve, if you don’t want this or you just can’t do this, you can legally have it terminated.”

And the archer sees everything in the look of horror. “That’s…that’s…NO!” Steve gets up pacing, more agitated than before. “I would never…I can’t believe…why would you, of all people, bring that up?”

“Well Steve, I come in here and you look like your best friend died, what am I supposed to think?” Steve stops, nodding. “Why are you so torn about this then?”

“How the hell do I tell Bucky? I mean, we just got certain things figured out and now this!” Rubbing his hands down his face, he looks over at his friend, who is trying to not smile. “How’s he going to react to this? How am I going to keep everyone from knowing?”

Clint stands and pats Steve’s shoulder then pulls him into a hug. “You, Captain America, are about to leave on an extended mission that requires that you go dark.”

“But where can I go? I can’t stay cooped up in the Tower or Bucky’s apartment.” Steve looks mortified. “Oh god, what if he doesn’t want this?”

Clint laughs delightedly. “Trust me, he wants this, he just doesn’t know it yet. He’s an alpha. They don’t know how to be anything but proud and doting. You of all people should know that.” He hands the stick over and heads to the door. “Oh, and I’ll take care of the ‘mission.’” He even makes air quotes and Steve nods. “I’m going to offer you a piece of advice and you can take it or not, but after the vows, hand him that.” Clint points at the stick. “Trust me on this.”

Steve dresses, straightening his tie knowing that it has to come off during the ceremony, but wanting to look good until then. Looking down at the stick on the bed, he picks it up and slips it into his inside breast pocket. “Jesus, could my life get any weirder.” When he comes out of the bedroom, Natasha looks up and whistles. He has to admit, he looks damn good in the dark blue suit.

“Well, now that’s what a groom should look like.” She comes over to walk around him, looking at all the angles.

The apartment door opens and Tony comes walking in carrying a flower in one hand and a long pin in the other. “I’ve been told that this gets pinned to that.” He points at Steve with the flower.

“Give me that before you poke your eye out.” Natasha takes it and pins it to the lapel of the jacket. “Now you’re ready. You have the ring?” Steve pats his jacket pocket and nods. “Okay, let’s get you mated.”

Bucky looks like a damn dream in his slate grey tux and his eyes pop and intensify the crystal clear, unearthly color. Steve nearly trips getting to the archway. All he can think about is how he got this lucky and how is he going to deserve someone as understanding and loving as Bucky. Steve’s feeling a little sappy at the moment, but he’s getting married and mated to this perfect man in the same ceremony and that makes him the luckiest son of a bitch on the planet.

Bucky’s been put two floors down from Steve and he’s trying to soak in the tub and relax because he didn’t sleep and he couldn’t eat this morning. His father is driving him out of his mind and just as he leans back, getting comfortable in the tub, the door swings open. Sitting up quickly and splashing water over the side, Bucky is done, so done with his dad. “Pop, for god sakes ca…” He freezes mid rant and looks into the eyes of Bruce Banner. “Dr. Banner, I’m kinda naked here.”

Bruce rolls his eyes and sits on the counter across from the tub. “You know, you sorta barged into all of our lives and no one really took the time to understand you.”

Confusion doesn’t even begin to describe how Bucky is feeling at this particular moment. “Uh…I’m sorry?”

Bruce takes his glasses off and cleans them on his shirt, blowing on the lenses and placing them back on his nose. “Bucky, do you mind if I call you Bucky?” Shaking his head, Bucky is starting to get a bad feeling about this. “Good, so Bucky, you came into Steve’s life and gave him a place to call his own. That’s a very good thing.” Bruce reaches over and starts playing with the hair brush on the counter. “You and your father helped him find a balance between what he thought he had to be and what he needed to be.”

“I’d do anything for him.” Blushing, Bucky looks down at the bubbles that are slowly dissolving into the water.

“That’s good because I know he’d do anything for you too. You don’t force him to lose himself in your relationship and you encourage him to keep being who he needs.” Bucky nods and gets that crawly feeling up his spine. “But, and this is very important, if you hurt him there won’t be a place you can hide that Tony and Natasha won’t find you and when they do, I’ll let the big guy out to play. Capisce?” 

Bucky swallows hard and stares up at a man that seems so mind-mannered, but the reality of him and what he’s saying sinks in. “I would never do anything to hurt him and if I did, I would hope that you hunt me down.” Bruce nods and jumps off the counter. He’s gone as quickly as he came and Bucky sinks back into the water. “Jesus, what am I getting myself into?” But then he thinks about Steve and grins.

Steve looks like a dream, that Bucky didn’t even know he could have, as his comes towards him. The blue of his suit is dazzling with his perfect skin, bright blue eyes and golden blond hair. He’s Bucky’s every wish come true and he looks at Bucky like _he’s_ the prize. Reaching up, he has to wipe his eyes because this is not where he saw his life a year ago. He walked into the Center that day and had the wind knocked out of him. Now, that dream is coming to him and smiling like there’s nothing else in the world.

Taking Steve’s hand, Bucky raises it to his lips and kisses it tenderly. “You look incredible.”

Clint, who’s performing the ceremony, chuckles. “Okay, none of that or we’ll never get through this.” Everyone sits and gives their attention to Hawkeye, but Steve and Bucky don’t stop staring at each other. Clint clears his throat. “So the internet gods, with JARVIS’s help, gave me the power to stand up here today and do something that not, in my wildest dreams, did I ever think I would be doing.” There are a few chuckles. “We are gathered here today because our friend, our brother, our fearless leader has seen fit to get married and mated. What a day.” He looks at the two men that still haven’t taken their eyes off each other. Leaning in, he fake whispers. “You two are going to have to pay attention.” They look up and realize what they’ve been doing and blush. “That’s better. Now, they wanted short and sweet and I aim to please.” Natasha snorts from her seat next to Laura at the horrendous pun. “Steven Grant Rogers, do you come here today of your own free will and with a desire to be mated to this man?”

Steve looks into those stormy grey eyes. “I do.”

Bucky lets out another sniffle. “And do you James Buchannan Barnes, come here today of your own free will and with the desire to be mated to this man?”

“Oh boy, do I ever.” Clint sniggers.

“I like the enthusiasm. Steven and James have elected to recite their own vows. Take it away, gentlemen.”

“Steve, I didn’t plan this and never even hoped that it would happen. I spent months beating myself up because I wanted so bad to pursue you, but I knew it wouldn’t be welcome. We’re standing here today because whether you know it or not, you were the brave one. You opened yourself up to me when you didn’t have to, you gave me parts of yourself that are so special and unique.” He looks down at their hands and strokes over Steve’s knuckles. “I swear on my life to making you happy and always let you know that I accept you, I will honor _all_ that you are, and I will love you until the stars go out.”

Clint gets a little misty. “Damn man, that’s some good stuff.” He nods at Steve.

“Bucky, when I was little and nothing but fire and fury, I didn’t look for a mate because no one wanted me.” Bucky squeezes his hands. “When I got the serum and everything changed, I didn’t want anyone because who would really want me.” Steve looks down at the floor and Bucky takes their joined hands and uses them to raise his eyes back up. “I walked into the Center that day and had the wind knocked out of _me_. I didn’t want to like you, I didn’t want to be attracted to you, and I never meant to love you, but, with everything that I am, I do.” Bucky steps in closer. “You love me for who I am, not what I am. I will accept everything you give me, I will honor the joy we bring to each other, and I will love you until God takes his last breath.”

Clint has to clear his throat to fight off the tears. “Okay, so as everyone is aware, Steve and James have decided to share, not just their marriage ceremony, but also their mating. So Tony, could you come up and Doctor B you too.” The two men come up while Steve and Bucky help each other remove their ties. Handing them off to their designated family member, they accept the rings from the two men. “The exchange of rings is symbolic in that the ring is an eternal circle, never broken. Steve, place the ring on Bucky’s finger and repeat after me.” Steve does as he’s told. “Take this ring as symbol for the offering of my body to you.” Steve repeats the words and then it’s Bucky’s turn. Once the rings are done, the grooms remove their jackets and unbutton their dress shirt just enough to allow access. “Being mated is the greatest gift that two people can give to each other. Some call it an outdated practice, but I think their just chicken of the connection it affords the couple. Mating is a joining of the souls and a constant comfort to those that share it.” Clint looks seriously at the two men. “Gentlemen, do you accept the mating bite of your chosen?”

“We do.” Steve looks at Bucky and nods.

Leaning in, Bucky snuffles for just the right place and sinks his teeth into the gland. Steve’s hands tighten in his, but he doesn’t pull away, but leans into the connection. Pulling back, Bucky looks dazed. Stepping in until they’re touching chest to chest, Steve carefully moves Bucky’s shirt aside, taking a deep breath, and bites down. A combine scent blooms around them and Steve leans in to rest his forehead against Bucky’s cheek. “Jesus, a little warning would have been nice.” Bucky giggles.

“By the power invested in me by JARVIS, I pronounce you husbands and a mated pair.” The two of them just stand there and don’t seem to want to move. “Kiss already, would ya?” The kiss doesn’t linger and they’re both okay with that. They button up their shirts, their attendants help them into their jackets and the crowd goes wild as they turn. “Ladies and gentlemen, it is my great honor and privilege to present Mr. and Mr. Barnes-Rogers.”

They make their way to the elevator for the ride to the reception three floors up. Steve knows the others will follow soon, so he speaks up. “JARVIS, hold please.”

The elevator stops and Bucky turns to Steve confused. “Steve?”

Reaching into his pocket, Steve pulls out the stick. “I don’t know that there’s an appropriate time to do this, but you need to know sooner rather than later.” He hands the stick over, but Bucky’s still staring into his face. He takes it without looking. When he still doesn’t break eye contact, Steve nods down to Bucky’s hand.

Finally, after searching Steve’s face for any sign of regret and not finding it, he looks down. At first, it doesn’t register, but when it does, he takes a step back, leaning on the wall. “Steve, is this…are you…how…”

Steve bursts with laughter. “Well you see, Buck, when a daddy and a daddy love each other very much…”

“Shaddup you asshole.” Then his brow furrows as he looks at the plus sign again, then back up at Steve. “Stevie, what do you want to do?”

Taking a deep breath and closing his eyes for a second, he looks over at his husband. “If you want, we’re having a baby.” He holds up his hands because he knows what Bucky’s going to say. “And before you ask, I want this too.”

Stepping into Steve’s space, he reaches up, caressing the blond’s cheek. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I’m sure.”

_Six and a Half Months Later_

Steve does not know how his mother did this. He waddles out of the cabin at the edge of the woods that surround the Barton farm and finds Bucky coming towards him caring bags of groceries. “I thought cravings stopped at a certain point, baby.”

Steve frowns and puts his hands on his lower back trying to work the kinks out. Super soldier or not, carrying a baby is hard work and leaves his muscles knotted up. He has a new appreciation of what Clint’s done three times and why Clint was so sure that omegas were stronger than any other designation. “I can’t help what this baby wants and you love me, so you have to get us what we want.”

Bucky smiles and thinks how much he loves this man. Nothing could ever be as beautiful as Steve, but he’s got to admit to himself that Steve, with that baby weight is enough to make him think he is actually an asshole alpha, because he’s more than beautiful, he’s astonishing. “I’d go to the ends of the earth to bring you two anything you wanted. Luckily, you haven’t asked for anything I couldn’t get.”

As he gets to the porch, Bucky leans in and kisses him. “I love you.”

Steve starts to tear up. “Goddamn hormones.” But he leans in again to get another kiss.

Bucky carries the bags into the cabin and to the kitchen. “Clint said that everyone is going to be here in a couple of days. Seems those crazy people you call family don’t want this baby being born without them.”

Steve chuckles and digs through the bags until he finds the donuts. “I bet your dad is going to be here too, so it’s not just my crazy family, but your crazy family.” During the time that Steve and Bucky have been gone, they hear from someone in New York every day. 

“Hey, he’s your family too.” Steve sighs and heads out of the room. “Where are you going?”

“I have to pee… _again_!” Bucky doesn’t mean to snort, but he can’t help it. “Watch it, Barnes!”

“That’s Barnes-Rogers to you!”

A week later everyone is sitting around a big table in the yard, eating too much and laughing at everything. Steve hasn’t had to lift a finger since everyone got here, not that he had to lift anything with Bucky around. It’s starting to get on his nerves, but it is what it is. He’s rubbing up and down his belly and watching Bucky tell a story about an owl that kept them awake one of the first nights they were here. When Clint and Laura had offered the place at the edge of their property while Cap was on his ‘super secret mission that involved blackout’ they had accepted immediately. Fury had pitched a fit and wanted to know where Cap was and how to get in touch. Tony and Natasha covered with any and all lies that they had to tell to keep all of this under wraps.

As Bucky curls around him that night, Steve snuggles back into the warmth and enjoys the closeness. It’s another of those omega instincts he’s had to come to terms with. This late in the pregnancy he wants to be around Bucky all the time. The other man doesn’t seem to mind. Steve gets up sometime well before dawn to pee and get a glass of water. Standing at the sink in the kitchen, he feels it. “Oh…oh shit…BUCKY!”

Bucky jumps from the bed out of a deep sleep and runs into the door frame trying to get to Steve. “Baby…baby…what’s…” He stops when he sees the puddle on the floor. “OH SHIT!” Getting Steve to one of the dining chairs, he runs back to the bedroom for his phone. Thank god for Tony Stark. “JARVIS, get Tony and the others down here. We need a ride to the hospital.”

‘Already done, sir.’

Seconds later the door is being thrown open and too many people are coming into the small cabin. Bucky’s kneeling next to Steve, who’s huffing through pain. “Let’s get going, no time to waste.”

The large Avenger sized group is pacing the waiting area and listening for any sign that the baby is here. They do hear Steve every now and then screaming. It’s almost mid-morning before the nurse comes out. “She’s a perfect 9 lbs and 14 ounces and everyone is doing just fine.” There’s a cheer from the group. It takes nearly half an hour for Bucky to come through the doors carrying her.

Everyone crowds around, trying to get a good look at her. “She’s a big one.” Bucky frowns at Tony. “What? You have to admit she’s bigger than average.”

Bucky looks down at his daughter. “There’s nothing average about her.” The nurse comes out and Bucky rushes back in because Steve wants him.

Two days later they return to the cabin and make the decision that they aren’t going to return to the Tower for another couple of weeks. The team leaves, but not before going out and buying everything and anything the couple might need. Steve sits on the sofa, holding their daughter, and staring down at a face that he can’t believe he helped create. Bucky slides down next to him, watching his husband’s face. “You okay?”

For several minutes Steve doesn’t respond, just keeps staring. “I can’t believe I did this.”

Bucky brushes Steve’s hair from his forehead. “I’ve been meaning to ask how you feel about all of this.” The baby starts to fuss and Steve casually opens his shirt and lets her latch on. It surprises Bucky how sure Steve seems to be after everything he’s been through.

“I feel pretty damn good actually.” Steve looks up grinning brightly at his mate. “I wasn’t sure if I’d have some kind of drop, but all I can think is that we did this together.”

Bucky runs his fingers through Steve’s hair, leaning in to kiss him. Emma lets go of the nipple and squeaks. Bucky kisses her forehead. “It’s okay, Little Emma. Papa just can’t get enough of daddy.” Steve laughs, but leans into Bucky’s embrace.

They return to the Tower a little over two weeks later. Steve has been healed from the pregnancy and birth for almost all of that time. If anyone was to check, they’d never be able to tell that he’d been pregnant. Unfortunately, Fury is waiting when they get back. Standing in the common room, Bucky walks in carrying Emma, while Steve has the carrier in his hand. “I’m just saying, why have her in that cold carrier if one of us can carry her instead?”

“Because she’s going to be rotten if we keep holding her all the ti…” The words freeze on his tongue when he sees Fury.

“So Gentlemen, this was the super secret mission that Cap’s been on.” He sees the way that Barnes reaches out, holding Cap’s hand. “Stark told me that you two were trying to adopt and it seems it worked out.”

Bucky cuts his eyes over to Stark who’s standing at the bar, sipping from a glass and giving them a ‘just go with it’ look. “Yes sir, it did work out.”

Fury strides over. “Well, let’s see her.” Steve looks panicked when Fury looks over Bucky’s shoulder, but keeps his face neutral. “Well now, she’s a cute little one. What’s her name?”

“Emma Joy, sir.” Fury gives a contemplative look.

“That’s a fine name.” He comes around to face the two men. Holding out his arms. “Let’s have her then.” Bucky looks over at Steve, who really has no idea what to do, so he gives a stilted nod. Bucky hands the baby over and Fury walks away, cooing at her. Honest to god, cooing. “If they ever tell you no, you come see Uncle Nick and I’ll make sure you get whatever you want.”

Steve looks at his husband completely confused and Tony starts to chuckle behind his glass. “What the hell is going on, Steve?” 

“I have no idea.” Steve’s watching like a hawk to see what happens next.

“Yes, that’s right, Uncle Nick can even get you a helicarrier of your own if you want one.” Bucky turns to Steve, mouth gaping and finds his husband in a similar state.

“He’s just not what I thought he’d be, Steve.” Steve is stirring the sauce and Bucky is holding Emma, swaying back and forth. 

“I hear ya, I didn’t expect that either.” Steve turns the burner off and looks over at Bucky and Emma. She’s so damn pretty and looks just like Bucky and Steve couldn’t be happier about that. Bucky argues that he sees some of Steve in her, but mostly that’s just her attitude sometimes. When she wants something, she doesn’t give up until she gets it. Privately, in his own head, Steve agrees that it’s definitely his personality. “Do you think we can trust him?”

“He offered her a helicarrier and I don’t even know what that is, but I have a feeling that it’s something big.” Steve snorts and starts fixing their plates.

“Yeah, I think we can trust him.” He doesn’t say anything else, but Bucky watches him during dinner and knows the blond is up to something. It all comes together two days later.

Emma’s down for a nap and Bucky’s trying to get some clothes done. It’s incredible how many clothes their daughter has. Steve goes in to check on the little princess, which it’s becoming more and more obvious that she’s turning into, when JARVIS interrupts.

‘Sir, Director Fury would like permission to come up.’

Bucky looks across the living room at the baby’s door and sees that it’s still open meaning Emma is awake. “Yeah sure, tell him to come up, JARVIS.”

‘Very well, sir.’

He doesn’t hear Steve quietly talking to the AI from the nursery. The lift opens and Fury comes in carrying a box. “Where’s the baby? I brought stuff.”

“What exactly is ‘stuff’?” Fury sits the box down and opens it. Inside are two smaller boxes of diapers, a blanket that’s so soft Bucky wants to keep it, and a collections of bears, each one a different Avenger. “Oh my god…did you have these made?”

“It pays being in charge of SHIELD. Now where is the baby?” Steve comes out of the nursery with Emma nursing. He stops to look at Fury then tentatively looking over at Bucky.

Bucky knows immediately that Steve planned this, he can tell by the twinkle in his husband’s eyes. He glances over at Fury to see what reaction they get. “Director.” Steve’s looking at the man defiantly, just waiting for the fallout.

“And you chose to tell me that you adopted, why exactly?” Fury doesn’t let his emotions show and that’s what makes him good, but Steve could swear that he sees a little bit of hurt.

“Would you want to take the chance of your child being taken from you on the off chance she has the serum so she can be raised as a soldier to fight?” Fury lowers his head, shaking it and Bucky looks over at Steve and realizes that there were more fears than just being pregnant that his husband has been carrying.

“Babies aren’t soldiers, Cap. Babies are a blessing that should be nurtured and loved.” That just about knocks Steve on his ass. “No matter what you may think of SHIELD sometimes, I would never allow that to happen.”

Emma releases her suction and gives a tiny cry. Steve raises her to his shoulder and rubs her back until she burps. He switches her to the other side. “I’m sorry, Director, but I couldn’t be sure.”

“Yeah, and now you just owe me more baby time.” Fury starts unpacking the box.

Bucky goes to Steve, leaning in and kissing him. “You took a big chance with this.”

Nick looks up, smirking. “It was a calculated risk.” Steve barks a laugh making Emma jump. “Stop scaring the baby, Cap.”

Bucky is in Boston at a conference with his dad when the Avengers alarm sounds. Convincing him was hard enough, but he’s been giving all his time to Steve and Emma, so Steve wanted him to have something for himself. Steve is just finishing changing Emma’s diaper when they both jump at the sound. The baby is four months and Steve and Bucky agreed that the next time the alarm went off, Steve would go back into the field. But Bucky is gone until later tonight and there’s no one else to watch Emma. He heads to the living room and looks over at his shield. He doesn’t know what to do. He doesn’t want to let his team down, but he’s got a daughter to think about. Both his alpha and omega instincts are screaming at him to protect and care for her. The door opens and Clint comes running in. “Give me Emma and get geared up.”

Steve pulls her closer to his chest. “I…I can’t. Bucky’s gone and…I can’t.”

Clint takes Emma and bounces her up and down while she reaches behind him for the quiver of arrows. “Trust me, we have a solution and Emma will be safe. I had JARVIS call Bucky, so he knows. We’re sending a jet for him. Now, go!”

Steve suits up in record time and grabs the shield, securing it to his back. He gets the diaper bag, taking her back from Clint. Emma reaches behind her daddy to grab at the shield and squeals at it. “This better be a good solution.”

The jet lands on the deck of the helicarrier and Steve carries Emma across the deck and through the door. Clint follows close behind with the diaper bag trying to act like it’s a complete normal mission. Steve holds his head high and nods acknowledgment to those he passes and ignores their curious stares. On his way to the bridge, passing soldiers stop, gaping at Captain America carrying a baby, some wave as they pass and Emma squeals and kicks her legs. No one in the general population or with SHIELD know about Emma. 

When they arrive at the bridge, suddenly no one is paying attention to the information coming across the holo-screen above the table. The Avengers gather around Steve and each of them try to take Emma. She’s grinning happily at all the attention when Fury walks over. “You people have a job to do and I have baby duty.”

Steve turns to look at Clint. “I told you we had a solution.” Steve rolls his eyes and hands the baby over to Fury and Clint sits the diaper bag on the table. Fury stands at the table as the Avengers get their heads back in the game.

Hill starts the briefing, but keeps an eye on this situation with a strange baby in the command center. Not to mention the fact that Fury seems very comfortable with her and the baby lays her head on his shoulder cooing at the leather collar of his every present long coat. Steve looks over what they have an immediately starts to put together a plan in his head. When Hill suggests something a little more dangerous, Steve shakes his head and starts talking. Emma’s face pops up and she stares over at her daddy. Steve catches her eye and smiles through his instruction. “Tony, Thor, I know how much you two are going to want to blow something up, but I want to get Clint and Nat into the building before we set anything on fire outside.”

“You take all the fun out of being Iron Man.” Tony smirks over at him and Steve shrugs.

“I wouldn’t be the leader if I didn’t try to take all your fun away.” The group laughs, causing Emma to laugh drawing the team’s attention.

“Okay, if you’re not already, suit up.” Steve looks over at Bruce. “This is a code green, Bruce.”

“Bruce looks down at his clothes and starts removing his jacket and shirt. “Thank god I wore the stretchy pants.” Hill about loses her mind when he starts to turn green in the command center, but Fury waves her off.

Bruce changes into Hulk and Fury immediately holds Emma up to him. Steve comes over and Hulk takes Emma gently which causes many of the people on the bridge to gasp. Steve looks at his daughter. “Can you give Hulk a kiss, Em?”

She leans in, giving a sloppy, wet kiss to the big, green guy. Hulk’s face goes soft. They discovered when Emma was about two months old that if she was in the room and Bruce lost control, the minute he laid eyes on the little girl, Hulk became a pussy cat. Hulk reaches down and puts a finger to Emma’s belly, tickling her. She bellows with laughter and Hulk looks at her softly. “Em.”

“Alright, let’s go.” Hulk hands Emma back to Fury and Steve comes over, kissing her repeatedly. “Take care of her until Bucky gets here, please.” His eyes betray how torn he is about going on a mission.

“She’s in the best hands she could be, Cap.” Steve nods and puts on his game face, following the team out of command.

Hill comes over, staring after them and then looking at the baby. “Director, is Captain Rogers…”

“Don’t ask questions that I’m not going to answer.” Walking over to the far side of command, Fury and Emma watch the Quinjet take off. “Daddy’s going to be just fine.”

About the time that the team reaches their target, Bucky comes into the command center looking around in awe. Who the hell even considered a flying air craft carrier? Certainly not Bucky. The agent that brings him in, points at Fury on the other side of the bridge and Bucky makes his way over, spying a guy with dirty blond hair off to one side playing Galaga. It makes him chuckle gaining the attention of Hill. She comes up the stairs, looking as intimidating as ever. “Sir, you don’t have authorization to…”

Her words are interrupted by a squeal from Emma. Fury turns, giving a slight smile. “Well, Mr. Barnes, welcome to my flying city.”

Emma launches herself at her Papa. Bucky scoops her into his arms, kissing her cheek. “Hey baby girl, how’s Uncle Nick treating you?” She makes a babbling noise and Bucky kisses her again. “I bet Daddy had trouble leaving you, huh?”

Fury leans in. “Daddy was a little unsure, but he did just fine.”

“Good, he needs this.” Fury nods.

“I’m glad that he has your support in this. He’s a good man and a great leader.” Bucky starts to turn and go now that he has his daughter. “Where do you think you’re going with my niece?” Turning back, Bucky looks confused. Fury takes the baby back and goes back to the control panel. “Make yourself comfortable, Mr. Barnes, Emma and I have work to do.”

Bucky barks a laugh. “Can I look around?”

“Feel free. As the husband of Captain America, you have clearance.” Several heads pop up at that piece of information, including Hill, who looks over at Coulson. 

Coulson shrugs. “I just found out too.” 

Hill goes to Fury while watching the other man make his way around the bridge. “Sir, is it wise to have a civilian seeing all of this tech?”

“Hill, that man has secrets that even you don’t have clearance for.” She nods and walks away, keeping a careful eye on the new guy.

Steve’s plan is a strategic strike and once they get into the building, everything goes just like it’s supposed to. Hawkeye and the rest of the team realizes how much they missed Cap when he storms the control room of the base and takes out everyone in the way with one throw of his shield. “Damn, sure did miss you, Cap.”

“It’s good to be back.” Steve wouldn’t trade anything that’s happened over the last year, but this is part of who he is. After all the heartache before and after waking up and now he has a life that is more than he ever imagined.

The trip home finds everyone exhausted. They’ve been out for two days and Steve’s ready to get home to his husband and daughter. He pulls his phone from the compartment and checks for messages. There are numerous pictures of Emma and one video. Pressing play, he watches as Bucky tries to get her back from Fury, just this morning and not being very successful. Someone else is holding the phone taking the video and he hears a voice and knows that it’s Coulson. “Captain Rogers, Director Fury and Mr. Barnes have been fighting over her for two days. It would be nice if you could finish this mission so that we can have our Director back.”

Steve laughs and plays the video for the team. Later, as they land on the deck, one of the doors opens and Bucky comes running at Steve carrying Emma. Dropping the shield, Steve takes off for his family. Pulling them into his arms, he’s home. He loves his job, but this feeling is where home lives.

“God, I missed you.” Steve caresses Bucky’s cheek, kisses Emma’s, and leans in to show his husband how much he missed him.

Pulling back, Bucky grins. “We missed you too. When can we go home?”

“I’ve got a debrief and then Tony can drop us off.” He turns to see the team grinning at him.

“Oh, so now you remember that we’re here.” Tony’s snark has nothing to do with how he’s looking at them. His mouth may be in a smirk, but his eyes are soft.

They make their way in and begin the debrief, but Steve doesn’t let go of Bucky or Emma. Bucky sits next to him and hands Emma over so Steve can scent her. She snuggles against him and lays her head on his shoulder. Steve does the rest of his job, but leans heavily into Bucky. Occasionally, Bucky will lean in and kiss Steve’s mussed up hair making a quiet, only for Bucky’s ears, purr.

Steve sits in George’s office watching Emma with her Grandpa. Looking up, George smiles and it’s about as content as Steve has ever felt. “So, tell me about being back at work? It’s been a few months, you’ve been on four missions?”

Steve nods and Emma reaches up to Grandpa’s face and his mouths at her little hand. “Yeah, and each time it’s hard, but it’s also good.”

“Tell me what you feel when you say it’s hard.” George’s focus is on Steve now and Emma seems to understand that something important is going on, so she leans back into George’s chest.

Steve takes several minutes to collect his thoughts. “When I have to leave them, I feel the protective urges that an alpha feels, but also that need to care for them. It was really confusing the first time it happened, but I’ve gotten used to having those dual emotions.”

George nods, kissing the top of his granddaughter’s head. “It’s good that you can acknowledge those two feelings and what part of you they come from. But tell me Steve, when you accept those feelings, how does that make you feel?”

Steve tilts his head and bites the inside of his cheek. “I feel…I feel like that’s just me and how I’m made.”

George tears up. It’s been a long, uphill battle for Steve Rogers, but watching his son-in-law embrace all parts of himself is a magnificent thing. “I have no right to feel pride, but I have to admit that I do. I know you still have bad days.” Steve nods. “But you’ve come so far.”

“I’m not completely there yet, but I don’t think I would change anything about myself considering what all of it gave me.” When the appointment is over, George carries Emma into the kitchen with Steve following behind. 

Something stops him in his tracks just inside the doorway. Bucky smiles and comes over to his father, kissing his daughter’s cheek and looks up to see Steve. Something in the blond’s face is off. Thinking that maybe it was a bad session, he goes towards his mate. Other’s are milling around the kitchen and out in the hallway and Steve holds his hands out to stop his husband’s movements. Bucky freezes and looks back at his dad, who shrugs not knowing what this is about. Steve looks down at the floor and back up again. 

Steve knows that others can hear him and he says it anyway because if he’s going to acknowledge it in a public place, the Center is the best place to start. Bucky’s been patient with Steve’s need to keep certain things private, but Steve can no longer justify those restrictions. Looking around, he sees the other counselors, lawyers and visitors watching him with interest. “I was born an alpha, but the serum made my body is omega.” Looking at Bucky, Steve smiles and adds softly. “I’m your omega and you’re my alpha. I love you and everything you’ve been through with me. I love our daughter that I gave birth to and I shouldn’t be ashamed of any of that. Being in an omega body means that I’m strong and capable in ways that other designations don’t understand. Being an alpha means I’m protective and possessive and that’s okay too.”

Bucky beams at him. “Damn right it is.” He turns to looks at Emma. “No way in hell I could have done _that_ with the grace and determination that you had.”

“Damn right you couldn’t.” Bucky snorts and envelopes Steve in a hug. “We’re a mated pair and I want everyone to know. I don’t want us to live in the shadows anymore. If anyone has anything to say about it, I’ll kick their asses.”

Bucky leans away, amazed again by this man. “I’ll stand off to the side with Emma cause someone has to hold the princess and I’m not big on getting beat up.”

“No one’s going to beat you up, they’d have to get through me first.” Steve wraps his arms around Bucky, pulling him close.

“Then god help them.” Bucky’s nose crinkles up with that adorable smile that makes Steve’s heart flutter.


End file.
